HermitCracc: Hermits on crack done right

Part 2: RIP Zedaph...

Hi :)
Quick note, while most chapters in this will be collab s between me and Cas this time Cas wrote the whole thing including all the A/Ns in this excluding this one.

So, this wasn't planned. I just told Azalea "I AM GOING TO WRITE AN ANGSTY SHEEPDAPH THING." Azalea was like "ok psycho shut the fuck up" except they didn't say shut the fuck up

WITHOUT FURTHER ADO....

Zedaph was drinking some lovely soda (It had crack in it) and he wasn't supposed to finish the soda.

Ren was the one who gave him the soda, he said, "This crack soda tastes AMAZING! JUST DON'T DRINK IT ALL OR YOU'LL DIE!"

Unfortunately, Zedaph decided not to listen, because crack filled soda was just so delicious. Even though Ren had just been cleared from the ER for brain damage five times in three days, Zedaph knew he would never question him again.

Zedaph started to feel a lil dizzy. You see, they were also playing putt putt golf with Keralis, the sheep, Iskall, and some others. (even though Ren couldn't even be trusted with a golf club according to literally every single doctor he's seen for his excessive brain damage units).

Well, Ren decided to whacc Zedaph in the head, and he just flat out died, both from the club and the crack!

"NO MY LOVER" the actual sheep, not some PERSON ew in a costume, the ACTUAL sheep cried, balling his small, sheep sized eyes out.

"I guess the doctors were right, sorry," Ren said. He had also killed five other people in this putt putt round alone, so this didn't surprise him.

The cops pulled up.

"OH F*CK ITS THE POPO" Ren screams. Normally there isn't any cursing in this story, but Ren also had way too much crack. He waggled into the fence and probably got his sixth count of brain damage.

"I always knew he was an idiot," Iskall says, "FOR I AM THE DAINTIEST OF ALL!!"

"SHUT THE F*CK UP ISKALL" said Ren, who is still attempting to waggle through the fence.

"You're under arrest, Rendog," the police said, putting him in handcuffs and dragging him away. Another cop went to drag Zedaph away.

"Mr. sheep, please let go of the body."

"No! This is my lover!!! How could Ren!"

"He's been arrested. Now please give me the body."

Sheep gave him the body, convulsing in tears.

𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕗𝕠𝕠𝕟𝕖𝕣𝕒𝕝

Three days later, everyone was gathered around Zedaph's headstone.

"He barely lived!" Sheep cried, going on and on about how could Ren do this to his lover.

Suddenly, Zedaph came out of the casket.

"Do not worry, my lover, I am here."

Everyone started clapping and murmuring how they were so thankful.

All of a sudden, Iskall said some words, one of which was a huge no no word...

"HOLY SH*T"

Everyone turns to Ren, who is in his bright orange, pink, yellow, red, blue, green and white prison uniform.

"What is that haircut, Ren?!" Is what Zedaph says.

"Zed... they.. They turned me EMO!!"

SO YEAH, this is what happens when Cas the Lovely is in charge of making HermitCracc. I know, so jaw dropping right?! And that emo Ren!

Oh but we aren't done..

"EMO???" Everyone gasps, and cries. Almost sadder than when they were at the fact that Zedaph legit DIED.

"UH, LET IT DIE??" screams Iskall.

"Iskall." Ren says.

"What?"

"SHUT THE F*CK UP."

The two start fighting and shoving wet noodles up each others' nose, elbows, and eye sockets.

Then everyone starts singing.

"I'm in love with an emo girl!!"

And then all of a sudden Princess Iskall and Crack Filled Ren had an illegal, platonic wedding. And the sheep officiated it.

"Do you, High Ren, take Dainty Iskall, blah blah blah blah blah we know the answer just get married already," said the sheep.

They all clapped, cheered, cried, etc. Zedaph almost died again.

The end.

So yeah. High as crack. We love cracc, don't we?

* C a s