Adoring Her

12 | Drowning

"Ma'am the designs for the new clothing line are in- if you wish to review them" My assistant informs.

"Thanks" I mumble quickly looking over the drawings.

"What happened to the black mini rose handbag?" I ask.

"Sold out and the supplier isn't ready to recreate them" She explains.

Fucks sake.

"Take your break" I hum.
"Oh yeah- right of course" She says before exiting.

I run my hand through my hair looking over the large amount of papers on my desk.

Piles upon piles.

Ignoring the problem doesn't solve it but at least drowning yourself in work helps to temporarily forget it.

I hope Mils is having fun.

It's funny how my life turned upside down in the span of 2 months.

Just because of a stupid contract.
Just 4 more months until it ends.

But I have 5 more days left to sign the custody papers.

I adore Mils with all my heart- it still shocks me that Mateo thinks I'll just sign the papers.

Out conversation that day replays in my head when I have the slightest bit of relaxation.

His words haunt me even in my sleep.

But he's right, isn't he?

I'm here trying to handle work and motherhood at the same time, barely making it but he is stable.

Probably has people for everything- Mateo is the one that can spend the most efficient time with Mils. Not me.

But then I'm her mother, don't I deserve to be in her life too?

Maybe I don't.

If I was Mateo I'd hate me.

Despise, ignore, irritated, anger, sadness, regret- that's only some of the emotions I can guess he is feeling.

He has every right to hate me but he doesn't.
That's what's so strange.

Mateo was the type of person in high school who was popular but quite, introvert but social, forgiving but he never forgets.

I've made mistakes.
Bad ones.

He isn't even letting me explain.

If he doesn't want to know my part of the story that's fine but I'll make him regret it to the point hr wishes he was Doctor Strange.

Sure..
You're not capable of that type of shit.

There's no way in fucking hell I'm giving him full custody.