Black is the Colour | Sirius Black

[thirty-eight]

xxxviii

aster

"Who the fuck had the audacity to finish the Cheerios without putting more on the list?"

    A moment later my forehead is whacked with the dull cardboard of what I can only assume is an empty box of Cheerios. They are the superior cereal, but of course I'm not confessing to scoffing the ends of them last Thursday while watching Top of the Pops. I bring my hand to my now throbbing forehead and open my eyes to find Severus looming over me with a thundering scowl.

    "Tosser," I murmur, sitting up in my sleeping bag.

    "At least you're self aware."

    I've been staying in the last house in Spinner's End with this moody git for almost four weeks now. I arrived broken – physically and mentally – and Severus has been helping to collect all the pieces and we're currently looking for some glue.

    His house is nothing like the mansion I was staying in before, but Salazar is it a million times more breathable. Sev wouldn't call it this however. His mother welcomed me with open arms once she saw the state of me. She even assisted her son in making a few potions and remedies to soothe my wounds. It's still bright and blazing but at least it's begun to scab. In the off chance I look in the mirror and turn when I'm changing, I see clear as day a red and raw scar in the shape of a capital 'M', travelling from my lower back to my shoulder blades.

    His father on the other hand probably doesn't even fully realise that I'm staying with them. He goes to work at the packaging factory early in the mornings and comes home after he's been to the pub with his friends. When him and Eileen fight I stay with Severus. He tries not to show that it gets to him, just continues to make potions or turns another page. Sometimes it gets so bad that I cast Muffliato just so that we can get some sleep.

    I stay in Severus' room beside his bed in a slightly deflated blow up matress. The space displays his personality; reserved but intelligent. There's not many personal items or childhood mementos but there are books which I know he could quote from memory and an at home potion set in the corner. The rooms are small and cramped but we're not in the house much anyways.

    We either spend our time working, walking or training.

    Severus helps to pay rent by working in the Hillards only a few minutes away. He thought I could get a job with them but when my apparent lack of Muggle knowledge became clear he thought maybe not. How was I meant to know that baked beans came from a can and not the bakery section? Why would they call them baked? So yes my one day trial didn't exactly go as planned.

    I know I'm pretty much loaded with money but that's all kept in Gringott's and I don't see myself entering Wizarding society for another while. I find the town of Cokeworth soothing with it's crumbling bricks and spiteful people. The riverbank is littered with crushed coke cans and miscellaneous rubbish. Nobody's pretending to be anything. It's so honest and refreshing. I'm told that across the river the shops and streets are shinier and the people are more welcoming but I have no desire for more lies. It also has another thing keeping me from crossing the bridge. I don't want to risk seeing Lily. I can't pinpoint why but seeing her in the current state I'm in— I just know that I'd break into a million little pieces. Something about the thought of her green eyes filling with pity makes my stomach go sick. I'd much rather that she hated me.