Our Little Secret

Chapter 9: Overthinking

My mind was flooding with thoughts after Venti said that to me last night. I had no idea if I was even ready for someone to have a crush on me like that yet. Especially when he is my ex's brother. 

I like Diluc. He's sweet, caring, compassionate, and just an overall good person. He has seen me at my worst and still sticks around. That says a lot to me. When me and Kaeya were together, I didn't feel supported. I always said to myself, "You love him. All that matters is that he's happy." I stuck around for him but he didn't do that for me. He avoided me like the plaque when I was ever upset. I got through my hardships on my own. But I don't feel that way when I'm with Diluc. 

Personally, I don't feel ready yet. However, I can't help but think about Diluc constantly. I can't help myself when he is in my presence. His red hair is so vibrant and flows so elegantly in the wind. His face looks like it was sculpted by the gods. He has this rough exterior that makes the locals of Mondstadt fear him. But he is like a teddy bear on the inside. I continuously daydream of the moment he grabbed me in the tavern. The time Kaeya came in with a new girl. Diluc showed so much concern for me that it makes me tear up when I think about it. 

I have feelings for him, don't I? I do. Holy shit I do. But am I ready for another relationship? I don't know. I want him but what if I am reading into things too much? What if he is just showing his kindness to me because that is how he is? I can't help but think that.

That day at work was miserable. I was starting to overthink absolutely everything Diluc did. He smiled at me. When he took a bottle from my hands, our hands accidentally touched. Every time me and Diluc interacted, Venti gave me a look. It was really starting to mess with me. I couldn't tell what were signs and what weren't. 

By the end of the day, I was exhausted. Mentally exhausted. Diluc definitely took notice as he immediately stopped me in my tracks. "Y/n, is everything okay?" he asked, placing his hand on my shoulder, gently.  I gasped so aggressively, my body made contact with the ground. "Oh my god, Y/n. Are you okay" he asked, attempting to help me back on my feet. I anxiously shoved his hand away, trying my best to not be rude. I stood up so fast, I almost fell right back on my ass. "Um I really have to get home. Goodnight-"

Suddenly, Diluc lightly pushed me into the wall of the tavern. He laid his hands on either side of me, staring into my eyes. He looked puzzled, like he was trying to read my mind. I was on the verge of hyperventilating, he was so unbelievably close to me. I could feel his breath onto my skin, causing goosebumps to form all over my body. 

"Y/n, tell me the truth." he said, not taking his eyes off of me. I felt intimidated by his intense gaze so I turned my head to look at the other buildings around us. He placed his fingers on my chin and made me look at him. I gasped, my mind running blank. "Um" I stuttered. I was so overwhelmed with how close he was that my mind was almost to the point of just shutting down. 

When I thought I was gonna pass out, Diluc let go of me and stepped back. "I knew it" he smirked. "Huh?" I blurted out in response. 

He waved me goodbye and left without saying another word. I was left in the middle of Mondstadt city, blushing like a mad man, and my mind spiraling. 

What just happened?