I was used to being alone.
I was always the girl surrounded by people, yet still utterly alone.
It was comforting. I had grown immune to the feeling of being by myself.
But then, I met him.
And despite the voices in my head screaming at me to not l...
Waking up today, the sun is peeking through the windows in my bedroom, causing golden rays to shine across my face. I sit up in bed and stretch my arms above my head before taking a minute to look at the waves crashing against the shore in my backyard. A smile appears on my face as I remember the plans that I have for today: Lex is coming over.
When I had first asked her to spend the day with me, I honestly did not expect her to say yes. I mean, I know I kind of brought it upon her unexpectedly, but something about her just makes me want to spend every second of every day with her. So I'm gonna try my best to make that happen.
Today is not a date.
As much as I wish it was, that's not something Lex is ready for, and I'm okay with that. I will wait for her as long as she needs.
Something about what Lex said yesterday stuck with me. Well if I'm being honest, all of what she said stuck with me, but one thing in particular. She mentioned the word oblivion. I've never really thought of it in the way that she described it, I had always thought of oblivion to mean that someone was just scared of being forgotten. But that is the totally opposite of Lex. If anything, it feels like she almost wants to be forgotten.
She talked about how her brain is a scary place for her, and how it makes her suffer a lot; that broke my heart to hear. I have also struggled with my mental health, but the way Lex described her suffering caused a pit to form in my stomach. She's the last person that should ever have to go through that.
The scariest part isn't even how well she hides it, it's how hard she tries to. I knew from the moment that I entered the office and saw her yesterday, that something was wrong. Chris confirmed that when he asked to speak to her in his office. It's not like I need to or even want to know what has happened that has caused her to feel the need to fake her beautiful smile, I just want to see her smile for real.
Man, her real smile is everything. I'm convinced she could light up the sky on the darkest day with just a peek, or maybe take out an entire army. That's fine by me, the less people I have to worry about taking her from me, the better.
I swing my legs over the side of the bed before standing up and walking into my bathroom. I turn on the shower, waiting for the hot water to appear before discarding my boxers and stepping in. After washing my hair and body I step back out and wrap a towel around my waist. As I begin to brush my teeth, I hear my phone chime from the table next to my bed, I walk over and unplug it from the charger before walking back into the bathroom. After finishing brushing my teeth I look down to see one new text message.
From: Lex What's your favorite smoothie?
I smile at the thought of her asking for a simple little fact about me before replying.
To: Lex Definitely mango
I hit send, before walking over to my closet to pick my outfit for the day. The keywords for today are simple and low-key. With that in mind, I throw on a pair of yellow swim trunks and a t-shirt with two unicorns on it. Simple, and low-key. Perfect.
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