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3RD PERSON POV:
Right now Nct 127, Nct dream and some other Nct members are in the waiting room, waiting for their time to perform. Today is the 31st seoul music award (sma) and Nct 127 is the next artist to perform. Jeno realised that his favorite hyung was unusually very quiet that night, usually he would be chatting loudly with the other members. And when he hugged his hyung earlier, his hyung hugged him so tight as if there's no tomorrow. When he smiled it had a deep sadness on it, instead of the usual wide gummy smile.
Jeno is very worried, so he asked his Jaehyun hyung if he's Doyoung hyung is ok. All he received was a shrug and "yeah". He thought that there's something wrong otherwise. He slowly went to Doyoung, about to ask him about it, but it's too late as Nct 127 has to go up on stage already. 'I should ask later' he told himself and went out to sit and watch the performance.
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Nct 127 finished their performance without any problem, well that's what they thought. While performing, Doyoung was struggling to dance. His ankle was left untreated till now, therefore it started hurting as soon as he began dancing. He tried to endure it and luckily no one seems to notice, but he was unsatisfied with it. He thought that he dragged the performance and ruined it.
His members rarely talk to him nowadays, wondering if he did something to upset or anger them. His best friend doesn't hang out with him anymore, and his members doesn't invite him to eat out like they used to. All he get everyday was their cold gazes and them being distant. One time he tried being his old self like the old times, hugging his members but all he received was them pushing him away and asking him to stop bothering them. All he wanted was their attention and going back to how it was before but it brought him more pain instead.
While thinking about all of this, he's now on the way to their waiting room with the members, walking up the stairs. Doyoung hasn't eaten all day as he woke up late for his solo schedule and had to rush to the next venue for rehearsal. So when he's half way up the stairs, he felt dizzy and lost his balance. He closed his eyes, waiting for the hard floor to hit his back. Instead he was met with hands holding his shoulders from behind.
He was stunned for a while and stood up straight, holding onto the railing. "Are you ok?", Doyoung looked up and saw an unfamiliar face. "Gamsahabnida, and yeah I'm fine" he said bowing to the stranger, "you seem to hurt your foot, are you sure your ok? I'm Jihoon by the way, Park Jihoon. I'm a staff here" holding out his hand. Doyoung shook his hand, "I'm Doyoung and yes I'm really fine thank you for asking". "Oh yeah I know you, Nct right? I love your performance earlier you were so cool", he said smiling.
'Cool? He's just probably trying to be nice'
"Where's Doyoung?!", Doyoung turned around and realised none of his members were there. "Oh sorry Jihoon but I have to go and thank you for earlier. See you around", he said waving and rushing back to his waiting room. Jihoon didn't even get to say anything back to him.
Doyoung got back to the waiting room and saw his members wiping off their sweat while holding a mini fan. Taeyong met his eyes as soon as he went inside "where were you? Stop wandering around, we have to go out soon!" "sorry", he dried off his sweat and quickly followed his members outside to sit with the other idols.
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Doyoung was very tired and hungry from not eating all day. His manager tried asking him to eat before the rehearsal but he refused, thinking that his members will be mad at him if he's late again.
The award show was about to end, Doyoung was so happy and proud that his babies, Nct dream, won best album that night. He thought that they deserved it as they worked hard for their 1st full length album. It's time for the last award, artist of the year. "NCT 127!!", he couldn't believe it, they won. He was shocked, of course his members deserve it but does he?
He stood up with pounding heart and went up the stage. His tears were ready to fall any second. 'Do I really deserve this? Am I even allowed to be happy receiving something I don't deserve? I know everyone is thinking why I'm even up here'. He looked at the crowd and could imagine the whispers and criticism he's getting from everyone and their deadly gazes that could pierce through his body. With shaking hands, he covered his mouth and tears flowed endlessly.
