Achievement Of Yesterday [COMPLETED]

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I was standing in my grandma and grandpas home. Hindi sila makatingin sa akin ng diretso na siyang ikinataka ko. I went here to have a peace and let my thought out but I feel something wrong, I knew they know about it. I still calm myself, without using any emotion. Hindi ko maiwasan na makaramdam ng kirot sa aking dibdib. Why all people around me need to lie? May nagawa ba ako kaya ganito ang pinaparanas nila sa akin? Kulang pa ba ang mga ginawa ko? Then why? 

Hinawakan ni lola sa braso si lolo. They looking at each other. Ibinaba ko ang paningin ko sa aking kamay na magkadikit. Pinipigilan ko ang pagtulo ng aking luha. I don't want them to see it, It's a shame. I just want to know who my real father is. I want to meet him. 

"Jixie, apo…" umangat ang tingin ko sa kanilang dalawa. I saw sadness drawn in their faces as they stare at me. 

"You're the woman version of your dad," matamis na ani ni lola. Lola sighed. Whenever I look at my face in the mirror I see an unfamiliar face and it's because of him. I'm his replica. 

"Your dad is very different to your real father. They use to become best friend when they're kids. Magkasundo silang dalawa sa lahat ng bagay. Naalala ko pa kung paano nila protektahan ang isat isa, pero lahat ng iyon ay unti unting lumabo hanggang sa hindi na sila magkaayos. Your grandpa gave the position to your father and his brother started to feel anger and jealous," Her voice started to become in a sad tone. "We tried everything but he kept fighting to have that position. Your father went to us, kinausap niya kami na ang kapatid na lang niya ang humawak pero hindi kami pumayag. Nalaman na lang namin ns umalis na ang kapatid niya at nawalan na kami ng komunikasyon sa kanya…"

I looked at the window, humahangin lang malakas na nagpapasayaw sa makapal na kurtina. "And years passed. We met your mother as your father's girlfriend. But their relationship is not known by the parents of your mother. Nabahala kami para sa kanilang dalawa pero wala kaming nagawa, they deeply in love each other. Nagbunga ang pagmamahal nila at ikaw iyon, jixie." I sadly smile while listening in my parent's story. "But suddenly accident happened. Your father die at the day where he propose to your mom. Doctor's tried to revive him many times but his body gave up." My tears slowly fall. 

"When your mom 's parents knew about it, they started to do the unthinkable action. They don't want others to see that their daughter is going to be a single mom, raising you on her own. They want your mom to have a man that accompanies both of you and the only answer that they know is your uncle, whom you know as your dad. Believe us, your uncle is forced to take it. Wala kaming nagawa, we want you to have a father to be known. Pinaubaya namin sa kanya ang posisyon na dapat sa ama mo. We did it to make him stay."

I sniffed. My shoulder slightly shaking. "Please, don't hate the both of them," pakiusap ni lola. She's crying in my grandpas shoulder. How can I hate them? They still my family, but I can't take the fact that they remove my father's place in my life. Kaya't ganun na lamang ang pagtataka ko kung bakit sa bawat araw na kasama ko sila ay parang may kulang sa pagkatao ko. I thought it was just a little thing, it's has a big impinge in my life. 

I'm watching the sky above. I went in the park to feel the fresh air. Ang aking likod ay nakahiga sa damuhan. It's already afternoon but I still don't have reason to go home. I feel lifeless. Kahit ilang minuto na akong natitig sa itaas ay hindi ako napapagod. Knowing that he's watching me there. Everything that I discovered make me feel pain at the same time peace. Napunan ang matagal na tanong sa pagkatao ko. 

I was smiling, imagining my father's face. "I know you're always watching me until now, I hope I can see your face. I hope I can touch you or even say to you how I love you…" I can't help but to cry again. How I wish…