𝐏𝐔𝐃𝐃𝐋𝐄𝐒 | ✍︎︎

𝗖𝗵𝗮𝗽𝘁𝗲𝗿 𝟯𝟲

I grip the cup of my hot chocolate, which has been heavily doused in pumpkin spice powder.

She's not in a coma, she didn't have a seizure, and you did not see it happen.

I let out a choppy breath, the images of her seizing flashing through my mind.

I had run after them when I was sure no one would see me. I saw Usok break down, and when he moved to see Adonis and Zara, I saw her.

Her body shaking, her eyes rolled back as Rylie kept glancing from her to the clock.

I don't know how Usok ever acted so normally after having seen her seize for the first time, how he automatically went to comforting everyone.

He had done it 2 nights ago as well, going straight to my two older brothers to make sure they were okay, after he had completely broke down with vomit on the whole front of his shirt.

A hand on my shoulder gently coaxes me out of my trance. Lazily, I rest my head against his arm, setting my now cold cup beside me.

I look around at the trees, almost smiling seeing they're turning orange and red, instead of their usual green. The fact that fall is coming is the only thing keeping me alive right now.

"Not feeling pumpkin spice?" Naveens husky voice comes from beside me, his arm moving slightly to sit on the small couch he has on his patio.

I only hum, moving my head so it rests in the crook of his neck, his light stubble scratchy as I move.

He hums back at me, running his fingers over my arm lightly. I relax into him instantly.

Naveen, my sweet boy, has been here comforting me since I called him hyperventilating after seeing my Puddles.

His uncle has epilepsy, and once I had finally gotten the words out he assured me that as long as it wasn't over five minutes she would be alright. He reminded me of her first seizure, how no brain damage was caused.

It was over five minutes.

One of my fists clench on nothing, the other fisting his shirt. I fight back tears, which is extremely hard for me seeing as I am extremely emotional.

Papa had never judged me for that, only held me.

Like this.

I almost let out a sob, my life is falling apart. I can't even imagine how Clailea must feel, if my daddy issues and mommy issues are bad, hers must be off the charts.

"You're alright," He isn't asking me, more as persuading me for it to be true.

Easily, he lifts me from beside him to onto his back, my head still resting in the crook of his neck as I hold back my tears.

It's proven an impossible attempt, seeing as the tears flow out of my eyes and onto his shirt.

"I know, I know," His voice is so calm, although their is evident concern in the vibrations of his vocal cords.