I Dare You To Reject Me Mr Alpha

Chapter 18: Leaving

Chapter 18: Leaving

Quote of the chapter:-

"Be careful
because butterflies
can be wasps.
When your stomach flutters
and your hand shakes
and your cheeks flush,
sometimes it's not love.
It's pain."

~a.r.

♚♔♚♔♚♔♚♔♚

I was pacing around the room, from sheer embarrassment and terror. Colton had left the house straight after he broke the news to me, claiming he had some pack work.

He probably just didn't want to face my wrath.

I still hadn't told him about Alpha Herald and if we do end up mating I will be putting his pack in grave danger.
I know what Alpha Heralds capable of, I saw it with my own two eyes, what he did to my parents.

I just couldn't let him do the same to my pack or mate.

Maybe I should just go and hand myself in, that would lessen the drama. I could speak to him ask him what his issue is?

But I know that's a stupid move, Alpha Herald isn't one for talking.

Only if I could speak to someone from The Wolfs Bane Pack, I would find out what he actually wants from me. I mean I'm just a regular girl.

There are so many beautiful she-wolfs why does he specifically want me?

I wasn't a picture perfect girl straight out a teen fiction novel, and I'm not just saying that cause I don't have any self confidence.

I'm saying what I see in the mirror.

Most books and movies portray girls as having perfectly flat stomachs, big breasts and big asses. Which quite frankly is unrealistic.

My weight is average, I am not a size zero model and have no desire to be.

But I'm getting off the issue, maybe I should tell Colton and he will want to leave me himself. Or I could just make him hate me.
The thought made my wolf howl in pain as I shut my eyes tightly processing my thoughts.

If I can't reject him, I will just have to make him reject me. If he willingly gives me up he won't have any regrets and I won't be responsible for the deaths of people in his pack.

But how could I make him reject me?

I mean he marked me? Just the thought of him rejecting me gives me an aching pain in the chest. Would I be able to live without him? 

That's the real question.

These last few days I had gotten considerably closer to him and him being away for a few hours gave me discomfort never mind him rejecting me.

Why does all this have to be so complicated?

I wish my life was simple, I could live peacefully with my mate and pack. But no I'm sitting here hatching plans on how I can get rejected by my mate.

Maybe I should speak to Xavier, he would understand, I mean he knows about Alpha Herald and he could give me some advice.

What if I just reject Colton?

I know he would just mark me again so I can't leave and the pain of being marked again wasn't something I want to go through.

I walked over to Colton's study siting on his spinning seat and taking a deep breath. Time to call Xavier.

I typed in the number to Red Fire Pack and waited as the phones patient beeps echoed through the landline.

"Hello Red Fire Pack" Xavier's gruff voice spoke as I sighed in relief, just hearing his voice calmed me down marginally.