Lost

Chapter 35

ELLIE JONES

Just like that, in the blink of an eye, a month has passed. A month that has been filled with tears, laughter, pain, nostalgia, and memories. There's no doubt that I have thought of him and reminisced about us, but I am determined to move on, whether my heart wants to or not. This time more than ever. For the first time in two months, my head is the one in charge, and not my heart.

I have another date with Alfie today. After the airport scene, we got closer, him being my emotional support pillar throughout the entire time. He helped me forget him and helped me get over the pain that I was so stuck in. I look at myself in the mirror, I am wearing a red sleeveless dress that stops right at my knees. The girl in front of me is completely different from the girl I saw on the morning of my 19th birthday. She has a concealed look of pain in her eyes, masked by happiness. A front that she put on, hoping that one day this mask will be replaced by true happiness. She's been on a winding road of love, bringing her to where she is today. She once told me to follow my heart, and today I am telling her to follow her head. Because despite the many tales telling me to just follow my heart, and that my heart has all the answers, I have learnt that it's listening to my heart has always just been an excuse for refusing to listen to my head. It's too bad I learnt it the hard way.

At the restaurant, while we're enjoying our steak and wine under the night sky, Alfie hands me a book. My book. It's the same book he annotated on. I take it from his hands, shooting him a look that asks why he's giving it to me again.

"Look at the first page," He instructs. I open it to find a short note from him.

"Give me another chance and this story can be ours, but one with a rewritten ending. A happy one."

I look up at him, his eyes waiting in anticipation for my response. Strangely, instead of feeling sadness, anger, or even happiness, I feel guilt. Guilt for giving someone else a chance when parts of my heart still love Isaiah. I convince myself that it's just my heart talking, and my head takes over. I had already made up my mind to forget about him, to move on and I will eventually lose any and every feeling I have for him. I nod and say yes. I am willing to give him a chance. He's been through so much with me, that I just know that any love that remains for Isaiah will disappear. It has to.

His face lights up and he leans over to me and we kiss under the stars. As I relish in this moment, my head tells me that this is the choice I should have made from the very beginning.

Unlike the story of Beaux and Alfie, a tragic unfinished tale of love, I believe that I have found my very own Alfie in the end, and I will finish our story.