Bullet: Devil's Rose MC #5

Chapter 22: Piper Bardot

I just can't believe that I masturbated afterward. I couldn't stop thinking about him. He smelled and looked so good. I don't even know how it happened. 

One moment, I had finished up my shower and was dressing myself in my pajamas, the next I had a vibrator up my vagina, my fingers playing with my clit and nipples, and I was grinding upward at the same time 'Bullet' erupted from my mouth in the form of a moan. It was a damn good fantasy.

"Hey, I'm going to go get a snack. You want anything?"

"I'm all good. Thank you, Beatrice."

"Of course. Dakota gets hyperfocused on things, so I just want to be aware of everyone's health."

"You're such a mom, a good one, but you really are."

Beatrice blushes before heading off toward the kitchen.

Children were always in my plan for my life. I don't want many, not like Fiona who is wanting to have three more children, but I have always wanted to be a mom at some point in my life. It was up until getting cancer treatment that I would be able to have my own. 

I never thought that I would have an issue with getting pregnant, but with chemotherapy and other treatments that I went through, it is highly unlikely that I will be able to get pregnant. The doctors told me that temporary infertility is common during treatment and getting pregnant after treatment can be more difficult. 

While that doesn't seem like a huge deal, there's a decision for me to make.

When and if I decide having children is in the cards for me, do I want to go through the ups and downs of trying to get pregnant or avoid that and go through the ups and downs of adoption? Or would I rather have a surrogate? I'm only twenty-eight too, so I feel like I have some time. 

Plus, I've wanted to have a family with a partner - a man or woman - and I don't have that yet. While I don't think everyone needs to have a partner to have a happy family, I have had the desire for one. I think it'll happen for me someday. If not now, that's okay.

"Piper."

I swivel my head to see Bullet standing there. Oh, that's weird. I'm thinking about having a family and a partner and he just shows up.

I try not to stare too much at his gorgeous physique, but it's incredibly difficult. He crouches down on the ground next to me, his thigh bumping up against mine. The scent of his cologne and sweat mingle in the air, a slight breeze blowing it in my direction.

"Good morning, Bullet. How are you doing?"

"I'm okay. A little nervous about my therapy session today, but overall, I'm okay. You?"

"I'm good. I forgot you had that today. Do you still want me to tag along?"

We are so fricking awkward right now. It's fricking hard not to be when you know that you masturbated to that face last night and all you want to do is find out what it's like to be with that person.

"We could grab lunch and then head over together if you want."

I hate this. I wish we could just be honest with one another. But if we are, and we do something more, it could destroy what Bullet has built here. This is his family. I'm not going to be the person that ruined that for him.

"Yeah, I would like that."

We both hesitate to say anything else, the silence now uncomfortable.

"Is it me or does this not feel like a natural conversation at all?"