Hope

Chapter 7

Hopes POV
I always took everything for granted. I had no worries. My life was perfect. Everything was perfect. I never appreciated anything really. Not to sound like a horrible human being or anything. But I really feel like life slapped me Into reality. Life really threw me some curve balls. Now I feel like I'm experiencing living hell. Everything was hell like. I feel like satan is laughing in my face, saying "gotcha you ignorant brat", but what can I say, that is the truth. A year ago I accused Tyler of things he never did, and now he's in a rehab center because I ditched him at a time where he needed me most. I found out his dirtiest secrets, secrets I should've known about. I feel horrible for what's happening to Ty, but I STILL can't stop thinking about his ways. It makes me feel gross, like I'm going to vomit. I know I say that a lot. It's been a couple days since I've seen Baylinn. My dad is always here, nothing really is happening with mom, but I feel like the nurses and doctors here know something I don't. It makes me want to jump out of this bed and-
"Hope?" I heard my dad.
"Uh-ya what." I said with a bland voice.
"Well um the nurses said that you can start walking through the hospital halls." He said.
"Great." I said with sarcasm. I really wanted to get out of this bed, but c'mon, at 7:45 in the morning? No thanks.
"Come on hun." He laughed.
"Oh hello, miss Macintosh. Let's get you walking- we have to speak with you and your father about-something." she looked almost sympathetic. I got off the bed, a little wobbly.
"Great work, come on."the nurse said.
"What did you need to say to me and my dad?" I suddenly asked.
Well I would like to take you to a room to speak to you,okay?" She said
"Okay...?" I trailed off.
........
We walked. a lot. finally we reached a room, we went in, and sat down. I was sweating like a crazy person. Immediately those thoughts started to invade my brain. Is it my mom? My ex-boyfriend? Wait, how would they know about him? Was it my dad? Oh my gosh Hope your dads sitting right next to you, holding your hand. You're such an idiot Hope, get your act together. Is it about my house? My dog Lucy? At this point every possible scenario played in my head. Repeating. my dad's light squeeze snapped me out of my daze.
"Did you hear me Hope?" The nurse asked.
"Um no sorry, a bit distracted." I simply stated. a bit. no way in hell. a bit. I mentally scoffed at my lying these days. Literally, the past couple days, I have been non stop thinking about everything. Maybe I am changing? I don't know! Maybe I'm not so selfish anymore.
"Hope. Please listen sweetheart." The nurse said.
"Excuse me Mrs. Nurse lady, I haven't slept in the past, I don't know two days. I probably got maybe 4 hours of sleep In total? And let's not forget, my mother is also In a coma, and has been since I've been here so back off would ya? My freakin ex boyfriend whom I love, tried to kill himself because I broke up with him. But you wanna know why I broke up with him? I broke up with the bastard because he beat his ex girlfriend, and didn't even tell me. he is basically a fake son of a gun, who's currently in rehab because of me. So give me a minute okay, maybe two?" A fake smile on my face. Nope, not changing. Still a selfish bitch.
"I'm sorry dear, I know you're going through- a lot, but we really need both of your undivided attention. we have some bad news for...you miss Macintosh." The nurse said quietly. Wait, me! I wasn't expecting this.
"Well nurse, what is wrong." My dad said with full concern. At this point, I didn't care, how much worse can I get? Like I said, Psshh I don't care about me! I care about my ex, my mom, my dad, and everyone else I love. I DONT CARE ABOUT ME.
"Well you see sir..." The nurse trailed off saying I had some big worded disease. I wasn't really paying attention, because I was wondering how my mom was doing. But my dad was sobbing, and stuttering random words like, no! This can't be! And I was just plain confused. What was wrong with me? What's going on? At this point I was curious...
"She can't have.....cancer" my dad screamed. Oh shit. I have cancer.... Wait I have-cancer-cancer-cancer. That word kept repeating in my mind. Cancer. And in that moment, I realized, that I cared a hell of a lot about me.