Hope

Chapter 25

Hopes POV
Forgive her? For everything's she's done. Never will I forgive this bitch...
"Hope, sometimes I feel very psychic
around you. I feel like I know what your thinking. You'll never forgive me, right?" Baylinn slowly entered the room.
"Why would I. You're a murderer. You ruined my life!" I sobbed.
"I didn't do anything. That was you. Who yelled at their mom while she was driving, causing her to drive off the road. Who yelled at Tyler, hating on him every second you had? You. You did everything yourself. The only thing you don't have control over is your cancer... well most of the time. Of course in your position, there was a reason you got cancer." She smirked.
"What are you talking about?" I asked frantically.
"Remember that time you smoked? Remember that time you smoked after that, and after that.. so on and so forth?" She said laughing.
"How... How did you know about that?" I asked. How did she know?
"Because I'm smart." She said.
"Why are you doing this to me." I asked quietly.
"Because you are the most selfish person I've ever witnessed." she said bluntly.
"And I'm changing Baylinn. Why does this keep happening." I said grabbing my head.
"Life is eating you alive Hope. Once it actually got real. But it's okay, you've almost cracked." she said.
"Cracked?? What??? What is going on." she slowly came closet to me, holding my crying body.
"Shh, it's ok. I'm not a bad person, I'm helping you find yourself, and find your true happiness." she said. I just sat there crying. I then realized that she knew I've been through hell an back. But everyone goes through hard times in their lives. This may be a bit intensified, but she truly is helping me. Am I actually starting to love my self, and I coming to terms with my true nirvana?
"Let it out. Let it out for Tyler. Let it out for your cancer. Let is out for everything bad. Let it out for yourself." she said.
"You know, Poppy used to say that to me. Let it out, its healthy." I smiled at the thought of Poppy.
"Wise minds think alike." She said. It seemed like a few minutes before I said something I would never say.
"I forgive you." I said. She just smiled, and let me go. She let me go back go the hospital with a note in my pocket it read:
'Hey Hope, at this point you have forgiven me, loved yourself,and found your true nirvana. Now go back, let all of the bad memories go for good. Think of these activities as your final step to recovery. Stop thinking about old Hope. And start thinking about your future, something I know you haven't thought about. Think about yourself, and your friends especially. Continue to get help, and love. Peace. Happiness. Remember, cherish your life. You only get one.
~Baylinn
Finally I was okay I think. I went back to the hospital, not to mention I was bombarded with questions. I told them I was spending time with my self. They saw the writing on the mirror, and I made up some weird excuse. They still were looking for Baylinn. I didn't really know what to do, you know? I mean she killed someone, and set my house on fire. And then there was my family They were glad to see me again. And I was glad to see me again too. I started to go outside, sign up for some sports. Because actions speak louder than words. My mom was almost 100% better, and believe it or not so was I. I still thought about Tyler, and everything,but I just smiled at the thought if him, I didn't cringe.
"Okay Hope. Last set if chemo, were gonna put you in an MRI, K?" They said.
"Okay, I'm ready." I was over joyed. I was in the MRI relaxing, resting my eyes. I felt like I was on a cloud. Nothing but a smooth cloud, maybe a drink in my hand. Yes, an ice cold glass of lemonade. I realized it's okay to dream, you don't always have to be in reality. But you can't always be in a dream to escape reality, there's a difference. Nobody taught me that one, I realized that on my own. I'm finally taking life into my own hands... once I'm cleared of cancer.
"Alright Hope, you might get a little woozy." They said. I gave a thumbs up in the small space I had. I smiled, I think the biggest smile yet. I felt free, for real free.
"Alright Hope, just another hour." He said. I waited and waited and waited, until boom! I was free to get out.
"Okay Hope, we will have results soon." The doctor smiled. I smiled back, until a thought popped in my mind. Poppy! I haven't seen Poppy in too long. I go to her room excited.
"Poppy!" I saw her sitting at her desk.
"Oh my Hope! I've missed you, are you alright?!" She started bombarding me with questions, until I stopped her.
"I'm all good pops!! I swear, I needed time,you know?" I said hugging her.
"Oh Hope. You never stop." She said.
"I know." I said. We talked for a little while, until it was curfew, so I went back to my room, where my mom and dad were waiting.
"Hi mom, dad." I smiled.
"Hi Hope! Oh I'm so glad you're okay." They both said basically in unison. Wow they care about me a lot.
"We never stopped looking." My dad said. I never said this but my mom and dad hadn't divorced, but were very separated and vague towards each other for a long time. But it seems they are getting along.
"I know, but I'm here." I remember lying to my parents a lot. But right now, this kind of lying, is helping me and Baylinn. It is a lie I'm taking full responsibility for. But was it really necessarily a lie? I did find myself. I did think about my life in a whole new perspective.
"We love you Hope. Thanks for taking responsibility through out this experience. We are so very proud of your behavior. You are now a women, a women with plans. A women with courage. A women with bravery. A women with integrity. A women who understands life." my dad said. I took all his words in like I have never before. Did he really mean this. He never told me this kind of stuff then, maybe it was becoming true now? Just then a doctor came out ready to tell me the news. Do I still have cancer. Or did I fight it?
"Hope, we have some news for you and your family." he started. My heart was racing.
"You did it Hope. You beat cancer." he said smiling. And in that moment It almost didn't feel real.