DISCLAIMER! THIS STORY CONTAINS, SELF HARM, DOMESTIC VIOLENCE, SEX, DRINKING, DRUGS, MENTIONS N ACTIONS OF SUICIDE... ETC.
THIS IS FOR MATURE AUDIENCE ONLY!
PAUSE.
PLEASE READ IN DARK MODE FOR A BETTER EXPERIENCE ;P
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JAYLOS POV*
MAY15TH, 2016 7:57 PM
I walked pass my momma in the kitchen to avoid any more arguments, i slowly crept up the stairs making them squeak, every step made me 10 times more anxious, I finally gave in and ran up the stairs not caring about the now echoing stomps roaming threw the arrow hallway, making it up to my room and closed my door. I laid on my back putting my Air Pods in, turning on "xxxtentacion motivation speech with music daily freestyle" on SoundCloud, I currently loved when x talked, it calmed me, although I've favored him and his music, I wasn't really the type to fan girl or anything (a/n- girl gtf-). I then closed my eyes zoning out as I focused on his voice ringing threw my head. I finally felt calm.
Not realizing I fell asleep, I was woken up by a two stinging pains in my abdomen, i then jerk up from the painful action, I quickly take my AirPods out, Looking up to a pissed off mom. I cry out in pain putting my hands on my lower stomach. why'd you hit me!?, i say as cry out barley being able to breathe, what the fuck I told yo fat ass bout running up my fucking stairs bitch!, my mom said as she got ready to slap me. I DIDNT MEAN TO, I said dodging her hit an used all the energy I could to get off the bed in time. She looked taken back my sudden movement and words. Oh! So, bitch you bold now.?, she said as she started walking to me. Terrified I got up and ran, just to hear her right behind me. I finally had made it to the steps only to be pushed down them, making me hit my back on a sharp corner, my vision soon became blurry from the sudden hit an the tears forming in my eyes, I watched her blurry body walked down to where I was, my instinct was telling me to move but I didn't budge so i wouldn't complicate things even more. I felt her kick my torso making me yelp in pain. Shut the fuck up!, my ma said as she sat on my chest wrapping her hands around my neck, making my fight or flight kick in and try to stop her from killing me, nothing helped she was too strong. mom pleas-, I said panicking from not being able to breathe, I was losing consciousness. No I'm doing wtf I should've did 17 years ago then I would've neva been stuck with your suicidal ass, I wish I would've aborted yo dumb ass, she said as she made her grip tighter, about 10 seconds later I saw a light flash and I lost my consciousness...
I woke up where my mom left me but I was in the dark, i slowly and quickly got up making my way up to my room, I grabbed my clear pill bottle that had different types of pills in them, right along with my blade, AirPods, w33d, an phone. I slowly get to my closet grabbing one of my oversized hoodies , slipping it on and open the window; slowly climbing out of it then closing it behind me, i then looked down to see how high I was up; "hm not that high" I thought to myself, I just decided to climb down instead to avoid making any noise.
I made it to the ground, and began walking away from the house that I dreaded going back to, "maybe tonight will be my last day here"
15 minutes later
As I'm listening to "tight rope" w one of my AirPods in, I hear footsteps not to far from me, I ignore it and made my way to the bando that I've been coming to for the past few weeks. I head up the stairs going to the large master bedroom, sitting crisscross applesauce in front of the broken window, i put my head in my hands before I start to take my items out my pocket and began rolling up. I pause for a few seconds from hearing footsteps, I grab my blade sticking it out as my heart drops. Why the fuck you following me, I said with my back still turned. you looked like you needed some company, the unknown person said, moving around. Hmm, what makes you think that, I said calmly standing up and turning around. Idk shi but I do know that you need someone to talk to right now, the tall person said now putting his hands in his hoodie. I could be a serial killer, I said crossing my arms. He didn't say anything after that, just stood there staring, uhh ok well ima get back to what I was doing before you interrupted me..no funny business ite?, i said as I sat back down, lighting the pre made blunt I made earlier, I then see the person sit beside me, an look down at my items; what's those for? He said as he pointed. Uhh for me, now no more questions- Mk?, i said looking up finally seeing what he looked like...
Jahseh Dwayne Ricardo Onfroy.....
I- uh I told myself I wasn't going to fan girl- uhm are you real?, i said as I moved jahsehs head from side to side with my blade. Which he didn't seem fazed with at all. yes I'm real? Taha, he said as he laughed. i put the blade on the floor an began to zone out. Jahseh?, i said being unaware of what I'm saying. Yes? He said still looking at me. Out of no where I hugged him, as I expected him to push me, instead he just hugged back. We stayed like that for a whole 30 seconds, until I came back to reality and quickly pulled away; I'm sorry, idk wha- I said but was interrupted. It's ok, he said as he smiled. So you do kno me?, he said picking with my blade. ya- I listen to ur music an interviews n shi, keeps me stable. I said as I took a hit from the blunt, oh shi Fr Ian think my interviews really helped ppl, from their responses at least, he said as he shrugged. Well if they don't help anyone else, just know that they help me...a lot, I said throwing the blunt out the window, picking the pill bottle up. What are you doing?, he said pulling all his attention to me. Nothing.., I said as I swallowed more pills than I can count. AYE nu uh you tryna kill yo self girl, spit it out. He said as he grabbed the nape of my neck. I stuck my tongue to show him that I alr had swallowed them. He just sat there dumb folded and panicking, I ignored his reaction grabbing my blade from him, and started to slash up my arms, but was stopped. Ma stop it, I'm not letting you kill yourself. He said throwing the blade somewhere. Intoxicated, I looked at him stupidity then down at my bloody arms; why do you even care, you don't know me nor do you kno what I have going on at hom-. I couldn't even finish my sentence.
