You Saved Me!

~*Chapter 38: Josh*~

My heart felt like someone had just reached in and ripped it out. Why is Olivia so upset? We had been arguing right before Louis and Harry had shown up, but she had seemed to be more pissed-off than upset.

I followed her to the room she was staying in. She pulled out her bag and started to pack up her stuff.

"I thought you were planning on staying? What about Harry ?"

Olivia looked up at me, and it felt like someone just kicked me in the stomach. Tears were just rolling down her face. Holy shit.

I took a few steps toward her until she held up her hand.

"Stop. Please don't come any closer to me. I don't think I have the strength to push you away right now. "

"Then, don't. Olivia I don't understand this. One minute, you say you want me, and the next, you push me away. You tell me you love me, but then you push me away again. Why are you doing this?"

"I can't do this right now. I just need to... I just need to get away from here... from you. "

"What the fook did I do? I can't fix it, Olivia, if you don't tell me what I did. "

Olivia stopped packing and looked up at me. "That's the problem, Josh. You can't fix it. I think it's best if we both just move on. There can never be anything between us. You can never be with just one girl, let alone me. Come on, we both know that's true. "

"You won't even give me a chance to prove to you how much I love you and how much I just want to be with you. Olivia, I don't want any other girl. You're the only girl...woman... I've ever wanted, and the only woman I'll ever want. Princess, please just let me. "

"Oh my god, please stop! No! It'll never work, so we need to just stop this now. I don't want to be with you. I said I love you, and I do, but. . . I don't think you are. "

"You don't think I'm what?"

Olivia took a deep breath and turned away from me.

"I don't think you're the one. "

I just stood there, rejected again. How many times am I going to do this to myself? How many times is she going to hurt me?

Just then, my phone beeped. I took it out and looked at it. There were three text messages from Lynda.

"Fine, Olivia. I'm done being turned down and pushed away by you. If you want me to leave you alone, you got it. "

I turned and started to walk out the door as I hit Lynda's number.

"Josh, please can we still be friends?"

I turned back and looked at her. My heart was hurting so bad that I couldn't even talk to her. I just stood there with my phone up to my ear. I knew the moment Lynda answered, I was about to break Olivia's heart, but maybe this was what I needed to do. She wanted us both to move on.

"Hello, handsome!" Lynda anwered in a chipper voice.

"Hey, Lynda, how about dinner tonight with me? Are you in the mood?" I said. Then I turned and walked away from the only woman I would ever truly love.

***

I hardly heard a word Lynda was saying. We were sitting in a small restaurant in Paladar that she had wanted to try. I'd told her earlier that I was heading to the restroom, but what I really did was call Louis to ask if Olivia had left yet. She'd left almost as soon as I'd left. Now, all I could think about was what had gotten her so upset and why she'd told me she loved me only to leave.

"Josh? Are you even listening to me?"

"Um, yeah. I'm sorry, Lynda. I guess I'm just thinking about Louis and Harry . "