Kabanata 37
Bring my name
“Why are you here? I thought you're in Manila?” he asked right after he processed that I'm here.
His eyes lingered at me confusedly. He's in his usual looks, fitted shirt and faded jeans. Ang daming katanungan na namumuo sa isip ko.
He seems tired or somehow exhausted. Parang wala siyang matinong tulog. Pagod na ba siya?
Now that I know he's not at fault and everything is clear, a lot of question occurred in my mind. Siguro kaya hindi niya ako kinakausap dahil pagod na siya? Baka pagod na siyang magpaliwanag? Letting me marry Devoe? Or maybe diverting his attention to other things?
Malayo sa katauhan niya ang manatili sa isang bagay na alam niyang hindi niya ikaaayos. I know he's not waiting for all those years. Sa maghapon na nangyari ay unti-unti ko nang tinanggap iyon at maaring tapusin na lang namin ang lahat.
“I go home... And I... uh... look for you...” Uminit nang bahagya ang aking pisngi.
Tumaas ang kaniyang kilay. The intensity in his eyes laced as he eyed me. Gumalaw ang panga niya.
Sabi ko na nga ba, hindi siya natutuwa sa nangyayari.
“Really?” he drawled.
His rasping voice brought chills down my naoe and spine. Mas lalo akong kinabahan sa titig niya.
“Well... you're a-avoiding me... and, uh... I wanted to talk to you...”
He raised a brow. “I'm not avoiding you. I'm giving you space and time to think. You need to rest.”
Bahagya akong natigilan sa sinabi niya. Napakurap ako.
“Uh... I think... we can t-talk now?” Damn the awkwardness!
I felt embarrassed for how I stuttered. Ngayon pa talaga. Napatitig siya sa akin, his intense eyes are making my nerves tremble. Uminit ang aking psingi at umiwas ng tingin.
He chuckled with my reaction.
“Do you want us to talk about it?”
Why is he asking me?
I bit my lip and nodded. Gusto kong magkaliwanagan kami. Alam kong wala siyang ideya na nakausap ko si Daddy pero gusto ko nang ayusin lahat nang ito.
He smiled sadly. Parang may kumirot sa puso ko. Umatras siya at naupo sa bench. He gestured the other side for me to sit. Umupo naman ako.
Nasa gitna naman ang paperbag. Nang makita ko ang loob, may pineapple juice roon na nakalagay sa cup na may takip. He brought foods, and I think he's usually here.
It made me confused a bit. Kung ako nasa sitwasyon niya'y hindi ko kayang pumunta rito dahil siya lang ang naalala ko.
“I didn't know you go here...” I muttered.
Nilingon niya ako. His eyes had this meaning everytime he turned to me, and I rather not to know it.
“I did.”
I nod. “Ngayon ka lang ba pumunta rito?” I asked out curiousity.
Tumagal ang titig niya sa akin. He lick his lips.
“Araw-araw...”
Hindi ko inaasahan ang sinabi niya kaya bahagya akong natigilan. Nang mahila ko pabalik ang wisyo ay unti-unti akong tumango upang hindi na humaba ang usapan. I avoid my gaze and cleared my throat.
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