his helpless lover

chapter 6

Dazai was staring desperately straight at chuuyas blue ocean eyes, chuuya didn't know what to do, he was blushing a little bit but he knew he shouldn't have helped dazai in the first place and now doing whatever he wants him to do is wrong "youre really stupid, thinking I will stay here and do whatever you want, I'm leaving." Chuuya pushed dazai's hand away and walked out of the room "oh and stop playing with peoples feelings you damn bastard. Humans are not toys for you to play around." Chuuya said and left, leaving dazai in his bed in surprise and confuse, he never thought chuuya would say no to him, and not that way, when he finally realised chuuya had really left he just layied at his bed staring at the ceiling and thinking all this memories he had with chuuya and he realised one thing, it was wrong just leaving him like that, but he didn't thought that because chuuya would be sad, only because he needed chuuya. He was the only person that made his stomach have butterflies and make him smile like an idiot. But nothing ever last forever, especially love.

5 months later

"One bottle of red wine please" "here you go! Have a nice day sir!" Dazai nobbed to the cashier and walked towards his ex partner's house, it was his birthday, dazai knew he would get hit and yelled at but he had to clear things with chuuya. When he arrived he knocked on the door 3 times with a specific rhythm like when they were teenagers, chuuya knew exactly who had come to his house "What do you want?" he said as he opened the door "Just to talk chuuya" chuuya chuckled "talk? No you don't want to talk you want to harass me to do anything you want! Go away you maniac!" Chuuya was about to shut the door but dazai put his leg and stopped it from closing "I just want to talk about the past chuuya. And I brought you a birthday gift too, happy birthday" he said while trying to smile, chuuya sighed and let him in "if you try anything I will rip your organs out i swear" "oh no I wouldn't want my organs ripped out its painful, especially by you!" "Just talk you shitty bastard!" Dazai took a deep breath "Do you remember when we went to that sunflower field?" Chuuya stayed quiet for a while but then replied "yes I do." "Do you remember that we kissed and hugged with each other, watched the sunset and picked up flowers for each other?" Chuuya tried not to show any emotion because he knew dazai would take advantage of it "Yes I do." "We promised each other that-" but he couldn't control his anger "I know what the fuck we promised! But you didn't keep the promise did you?! You just left! So what does this have to do with a talk to the past! You didn't even keep the promise so youre not in the place to tell me im wrong!" Dazai was speechless for some seconds "I know I didn't keep it and I'm sorry-" chuuya was serious "No you're not sorry osamu. If you were you wouldn't have left me from the start. You're smart enough to understand that right? And even by a sorry and even if I forgive you things can't go to the way they were and you can't use me anymore! Do you fucking understand?! You can't use me anymore! I'm not your fucking toy to use when you're bored anymore dazai!" Dazai was tearing up. After months of feeling numb a tear ran down his eyes, chuuya knew he wanted to help him and hug him but his mind took control that time "Go out before I fucking cut your throat." Dazai walked away and said a last thing to chuuya "i love you chuuya. Youre my happiness." He didn't reply to him and just watched him walking away, he wanted to run to him and kiss him but he was heartbroken. "Fuck you osamu." was his last words as he shut the door and opened the bottle of wine dazai bought him and drank it all in seconds.

They both knew they just didn't have enough time. They are the same but so different at the same time but one thing they knew was that they were made for each other. But both of them had way too much love but hatred too for each other that it was better for them to stay away from each other. This was not a love story from the start. It was just two teenagers enjoying their life for once and then remembering that happiness doesn't last.

Author notes:
This chapter is short but the next one will be longer! I just had to write a chapter for the other fanfic too and I couldn't write so much at one day:) oh and I got a new au I will publish when this 2 fanfics I'm writing right now are finished so if you are interested in learning more about it tell me! Thank you for reading have a nice day and thank you all for all the follows, likes and views you all make my day better! <3