How to save a life [ongoing]

Chapter 11

Tw: brief panic attack

'Why would he have kept it a secret. I'm his best friend he tells me everything. Am I not good enough? Does he not trust me? Why wouldn't he tell me? How long has this been going on?' His mind spiralled. He was checking his phone every 10 minutes expecting a response but there was nothing. Eventually he fell asleep.

Oikawa woke up the next morning with a heavy chest and tried to catch his breath. When he saw it he almsot didn't believe it but after staring at the photo all night he knew it was real. It felt too real. He sighed and unlocked his phone.

Oikawa: I won't be in today

Iwa-chan🥰: why?? Also I'm sorry I forgot to reply last night I fell asleep pretty early.

Oikawas heart sank further into his chest at the lie. 'He really was planning on keeping it a secret. Is he going to leave me for them?' Negative thoughts clouded his mind once again and a single tear cascaded down his soft cheek.

Oikawa: I'm ill, don't come over later either because I'll probably be sleeping

Iwa-chan🥰: okay

Iwa-chan🥰: hope you feel better soon and lmk if you need anything

He sent a quick message to his mom saying he was ill before putting his phone face down and pulling the blanket over his head. No one heard from him for the rest of the day. Iwaizumi looked down at his phone with a deep sigh before putting it in his bag again. "Oikawa isn't in today, so let's start to warm up." He yelled to the team.

Oikawa slept for hours. His sister arrived midway through the day. "Tooru; it's Emiko, can I come in?"

"Sure, What are you doing here?" He inquired with a confused look painted his face. His fluffy hair was pointing in every direction and his eyes were still half shut as he saw her walk in.

"Mom told me you were sick and to check on you during my lunch break." Emiko was about 5'6". She had silky chestnut brown hair which typically rested upon her hips but was currently tied back into a ponytail. Judging by her formal attire, he assumed she had just come from work. She wore a warm smile on her face as she gracefully rested on the edge of his bed.

"You mean she didn't believe me?" He closed his eyes and rested his head carefully against the headboard.

"Maybe. Either way I bought you food so eat up." Emiko's moved his hair out of the way and pressed her hand gently against his forehead. "You seem fine but how do you feel?" He jumped at the sudden coldness of the ring on her finger.

"I'm fine, I'm not too ill, I just didn't feel great today" she gave an understanding nod as she withdrew her hand.

"You can't be off every time you don't feel well Tooru. I understand it's hard but if you want a good job in the future you need to make sure you're attending school. Have you took your meds yet today?"

"I'm not and my attendance will be fine just drop it please. Also no not yet I just woke up." he retorted.

"Good. Also here." She dropped the pills onto the bed next to a bottle of water and a sandwich. "I have to get back to work now as my lunch break is almost over but if you need anything give me a call alright? And I'll tell mom you have a bit of a temperature but you better go in tomorrow. Love you."

"Thanks and love you too." Oikawa took his pills and ate before falling to sleep again. He woke up the next morning to the sound of his alarm. He wasn't surprised he'd slept so long. The setter dragged himself out of bed. He carried out his regular morning routine. From the moment he got out the shower, to the moment to the moment he arrived at class he blasted music through his headphones and fiddled with his hands. He didn't want to see Iwaizumi right now, he wasn't sure if he could. Seeing him with someone made him confused. What if Azumi was referring to him? Did he like him and is that why he was feeling this way? It's not like he had never questioned his sexuality before- he just chose to ignore it as he didn't think it mattered too much. However he is now more unsure than ever. Whilst he also wasn't sure how he felt about Iwaizumi being with someone, or his sexuality in general, he knew he felt betrayed by not being told. So many unanswered questions lurked inside of him, fuelling his anxiety. Throughout the whole day he avoided everyone.