Just friends or more..

Chapter 39

WARNINGS: Mention of drugs, sorrow and again a lot of heartbreak and confessions, some flashbacks and hospital stuff 💔

FLASHBACK — CHAPTER 38
Y/N POV

"You have 2 minutes... no more no less" I tilt my head towards him although I can't meet his eyes and feel my heart beat faster as the horrible memories of four weeks ago come flooding back even though I tried my best to forget those horrible memories.

BEGINNING OF CHAPTER 39
CHRIS POV

"I was in the hotel bar with the boys, as you knew by the time. Then Minka came along after a while, although none of us invited or expected her. From here everything came one after the other, at first Minka flirted with me but I didn't return her games, which is why she threatened me by telling you the truth about your dad's current condition." I breathe in and out before I continue my explanation while Y/N listens to me carefully.

"I couldn't let her tell you because I knew it would break your heart and I could never watch someone break your heart, I just couldn't , plus there was the promise I made to your father a long time ago that he said not to tell you about his illness because he didn't want you to worry about him all the time, although the doctors say it's too late anyway... he didn't want you to be depressed and worried in his last days, weeks or months and I respected his wish and therefore didn't tell you about his illness and still... at the end I was the one who broke your heart even tho everything I wanted was to protect it".

I hear her sobbing softly and I want to take her back in my arms and comfort her, I want to take away her sorrow and pain, but knowing that she doesn't want me to touch her hurts me the most "I'm so incredibly sorry Y/N... you don't know how many times I wanted to tell you because I felt guilty because you already suspected something was wrong and I wasn't allowed to say anything because I promised your father...".

She still remains silent and does not speak, my worries increase and my hope for reconciliation and understanding sinks "please talk to me, don't do this to me and don't ignore me anymore... soon I can't take it anymore, I have accepted that you haven't responded to my texts or calls, but please talk to me."

"Why was Minka in our hotel room and why the hell did she come out of our bathroom dressed only in a towel, Chris?" Her shaky voice gets harder and stricter with every word.

I can't quite see her properly, but through the daylight that shines through the small window I can make out her movements and see her hand roaming over her face, probably to wipe away her tears.

I wish I could kiss her tears away and assure her that I still love her and that the past four weeks have been the worst of my life.

I've never felt so empty and sluggish, I didn't want to get up in the morning knowing I would have to endure another day without her and that's why I sometimes slept through the night or got drunk on alcohol I have to forget this burning and this emptiness in me.

"As it turned out afterwards, she poured something into my drink while we were still in the bar" I shake my head, since only Minka is capable of something so absurd "she used my weak condition because of the drug she put in my drink and took advantage and pushed me into the hotel room. She started saying horrible things and claiming that you were cheating on me. Of course I didn't believe her, baby I know you would never do that. It got me so excited and angry that I slapped her on the cheek."

„After hitting her, i was shocked at myself and didn't catch her going into the bathroom and supposedly taking a shower. I was shocked that I was able to do this because you know my mother didn't raise me like that and you know I would never hit anyone on purpose. It happened instinctively and I'm not proud of it, but I still think she deserves it"