I Like You Lots (Steddie)

Chapter 20

A/N; I really enjoyed writing the end of this chapter. I hope you all do too. Ily. 💕 Song inspiration: Fix You by: Coldplay

TW; trauma, mentions of drug use, misgendering, pain, and like some complete adoration

"What do you want to be for Halloween?" Steve excitedly asks me while we wander the store looking for different costumes. He did manage to get me up and out of bed this morning even though there was a lot of complaining involved from my part. I just want to wallow but he really won't let me. Keeping me the right amounts of distracted is probably what's keeping me from teetering over the edge.

"I dunno... Something scary? Isn't that what Halloween's supposed to be about?"

"C'mon it's your favorite holiday baby, I know you're having a hard time right now but let's try to let it be for now? Enjoy something you like? You're allowed to still enjoy things."

"I know I just-" I sigh. "You're right." I nod and look through the costumes. "I mean... we could match or something if you want? Would that be too cheesy?" Steve smiles over at me, like I knew how to read his mind or something. "What do you wanna be?"

"Okay hear me out, but like...Could we dress as Star Wars characters?" His eyes squint a little, but there's a soft smile there too. "You're going to dress me as something nerdy?"

"Look you said you wanted me to dress as something I wanted to, and if we're doing something matchy we should go all out. C'mon, you be Luke and I'll be Han. It'll be cute." Steve rolls his eyes and nods, "Yeah okay you're right that would be cute." I look up at him blinking, with a big smile. "You'll be nerdy with me?!"

"How are you so sure I am not already a nerd?" He eyes some of the costumes, flipping through to find the right ones. "Steve, you're not a nerd." I chuckle and find a Luke costume, holding it up seeing if it's the right size. "This one?"

"That looks about right. And, how do you know?!" He looks a little shocked at my accusation, but I don't think I'm wrong. Knowing the background he comes from? No way. Not a nerd. "Look at you. No way." I find the Han costume for me and sling it over my arm. "I do like Star Wars... uh those little teddy bear guys?" I smack my hand on my forehead. "Ewoks."

"What?"

"The teddy bears, they're called Ewoks, Steve."

"Okay sure sure, whatever. They're cute!"

"You're cute. Let's go buy these costumes and get outta here? I don't want to be around people anymore." We walk to the front of the store, and get the costumes. Steve can't help himself to buy some of the weird little trinkets that sit in the front of the store. One of them being a gargoyle keychain. "Lookit! It's you!" He holds it up smiling. "You're never going to let that go are you?"

"Nope. Never." He happily attaches it to his keys as we're walking back outside. "Well what am I supposed to get that reminds me of you?" He hands me a small button that I didn't see him grab, it's got a ninja on it. "You're a fucking dork oh my god." He's beaming and kisses my cheek and grabs hold of my hand tightly. "But, you love me."

"Mm. That I do, Harrington." I pin the button to my jacket, smiling a little. It does undoubtedly remind me of him, I'm not sure how someone so tall walks so quietly, but, he's damn good at it.

We make it back to his apartment, walking into the great silence that it holds.  It's nice here, no one barging in. No loud knocks. Just me and him, and it's a good change of pace. Not that I would mind having Robin over, I never really mind her being around, it's just... different. I don't really want to see anyone besides Steve right now. Losing my mom is harder than I thought it was going to be.