Matryoshka Doll - NoRenMin ✔︎

Chapter 14

His insides were much too distraught so when Jaehyun finally answered, his mind finally felt as if it could take a well deserved break.

"Hello? Jaem?"

"Jaehyun! I miss you!" Jaemin cried and really, he felt as if his insides were about to fall out in a sorrowful happiness. "I'm sorry for not calling in such a long time but here I am."

Jaehyun was surprised. Never did he think he'd experience such a thing from his little brother. Not after arguing each time they called.

"What brings you on the line?" Jaehyun asked and by the loud sigh Jaemin let out, he could tell he needed to sit down. "It’s okay, I'll listen to your troubles."

Jaemin appreciated that and smiled softly although his brother couldn't see. The response also made him feel a little guilty because he was always there to listen and all the other times he had only stirred up arguments.

"So I don't actually know what to say or where to start," Jaemin explained sheepishly.

His legs pulled up to his chest as he sat on the roof, wind blowing back his caramel hair as gentle rays of sun made him glow in the evening sun.

"Start wherever," Jaehyun encouraged. "Just go along and we'll figure it out, okay?"

"Okay. Well, y'know how last time I called we kind of got into an argument?"

"Mhm."

"And the time before that as well?"

"Yup."

"Well, I think I kind of changed. Well, I hope I did but now I'm troubled."

Jaehyn wasn't sure what the last words were supposed to mean. Of course, he was overjoyed for the first part and he expressed as such but now he needed to know what was troubling his little brother.

"What do you mean you're troubled?"

"I've been thinking and I've felt weird things inside and I'm scared."

"What kind of things? Like pain?"

"No. Like when I see someone and talk to them, my stomach does flips and I smile a lot. I know it's a crush but I can't deal with it or take it away."

Jaehyun hummed in response, trying to figure out what was so bad about having a crush that would make Jaemin worry but he couldn't figure anything.

"So, what's so wrong?"

"It's an all boys school, Jae. It's all boys!"

And suddenly, Jaemin felt hot tears start rolling down his face.

He felt disgusted, troubled, and guilty. He didn't know if he was going to be disowned or yelled at and he started rocking back and forth, head settling down on his knees as he tried to reassure himself that everything would probably be okay.

Jaehyun went silent, too shocked to speak but Jaemin thought otherwise. He mentally prepared himself for the screaming, tears falling harder the more he waited but no yells ever came.

"Jaem, you have no reason to cry or be scared, okay?" Jaehyun soothed, his voice soft and reassuring. "I'm not mad and I know it's hard for you. Especially because your mind has been closed for a long time and experiencing this would be scary. Even for someone who grew up with acceptance."

Jaemin sniffled, his heart swelling in gratitude for his brother but suddenly, a loud and choked sob echoed as he remembered that liking a boy wasn't the worst of his problems.

"Jae! This isn't the worst part!" Jaemin wailed miserably.

"Then what is?"

"I like two of them at the same time! They're both so different and so perfect but they're best friends and I don't want to be a bad person!"