𝙵𝚘𝚛𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝚆𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚎𝚛 || 𝙰𝚞𝚜𝚝𝚒𝚗 𝙱𝚞𝚝𝚕𝚎𝚛

21 - Blue M&Ms

𝙸 𝚔𝚗𝚘𝚠 𝚠𝚎 𝚐𝚘𝚝 𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚋𝚕𝚎𝚖𝚜 & 𝚒𝚝'𝚜 𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚋𝚊𝚋𝚕𝚢 𝚖𝚎
𝙳𝚘𝚗'𝚝 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝚕𝚎𝚊𝚟𝚎, 𝚍𝚘𝚗'𝚝 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝚕𝚎𝚊𝚟𝚎
𝙸 𝚔𝚗𝚘𝚠 𝚠𝚎 𝚐𝚘𝚝 𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚋𝚕𝚎𝚖𝚜 & 𝚢𝚘𝚞'𝚕𝚕 𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚋𝚊𝚋𝚕𝚢 𝚕𝚎𝚊𝚟𝚎
𝙸 𝚌𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍 𝚗𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝚕𝚎𝚊𝚟𝚎, 𝙸 𝚠𝚒𝚕𝚕 𝚗𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝚕𝚎𝚊𝚟𝚎
𝚂𝚘 𝚑𝚘𝚕𝚍 𝚘𝚗𝚝𝚘 𝚖𝚎, 𝚑𝚘𝚕𝚍 𝚘𝚗 𝚝𝚘 𝚖𝚎

𝘚𝘰𝘯𝘨 𝘚𝘶𝘨𝘨𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯: 𝘏𝘰𝘭𝘥 𝘖𝘯𝘵𝘰 𝘔𝘦 - 𝘔𝘢𝘺𝘥𝘢𝘺 𝘗𝘢𝘳𝘢𝘥𝘦

ELSIE

After a ferry ride that seemed to take forever, we finally arrived at the island. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't regretting the decision to visit the beach in the dead of winter, but it was the only thing I could really think of to get him out of the house, I had to get some fresh air in his lungs.

After the Nox hallucination, his mental state took precedent in the forefront of my mind, whether I showed it or not. Especially when I caught him lying earlier about being high. But I knew better than to press him further, I couldn't risk him pulling away. I even lied to him when I said I took a break from work. In reality I had pushed back another deadline on my article just to go check on him.

He was mad, I knew that. I didn't blame him, who wants someone showing up at your place and prying your eyes open. Or who wants to spend a holiday with someone who gave you a black eye. But I made a deal with Nox and that was the compromise. I could either leave home again or spend Christmas with him. And then it was me agreeing to stay but having Austin join as my own bargain. Nox didn't want to be alone on Christmas either, no matter how much he masked it. So, pulling at heartstrings by emphasizing about how alone Austin would be on Christmas to someone who had the same fear wasn't that difficult.

Not to mention since I told him about about truth or dare he oddly seemed to trust me more? Which was not what I expected at all, but I was happy that things were improving. It wasn't a lie that Nox was doing better with me, he was. He's being all the things he did at the beginning, taking me on dates, leaving me notes, actually talking ti me about his day and we've barely fought this week. That was the biggest one, it was so nice not having screaming matches with him daily. They were improvements, small ones, but improvements nonetheless. He's not perfect, but neither am I.

We strolled the strip with iconic Coney hotdogs. The sun had started descending dark reds and oranges over the skyline. "And why exactly did you want to come here?" He asked, wiping the side of his full mouth.

I shrugged, "I don't know. Just something to do. Thought the ocean might help you relax a little."

"I don't need to relax."

Right because you aren't taking meds to 'relax'.

He barely spoke to me the entire ferry ride here, not even cracking a joke or a smile. Do you know how hard it is to cheer up someone that grumpy? Well, I guess I do, since Nox was a perpetual grump. "You wanna go on the ferris wheel?" I perked up, rides always cheered him up.

"I guess, sure."

I didn't know how I expected him to react, I knew it wasn't going to be excited, but I didn't think it would be that apathetic.

We made it just before they closed and were the only ones on the wheel. The ride began to rise, his expression hadn't changed but I could already sense a shift in him. A tiny one, but it was something. An urge to reach for him tingled in my fingertips, but I restrained.