That Boy Next Door [l.r.h.] *UNDER MAJOR EDITING*

|chapter 20|

I realized that my urge to cut was getting stronger everytime I think about yesterday. My thoughts were interrupted when my phone buzzed, I got a text from Luke,
'Goodmorning beautiful. :) I don't think you're coming to school today, so just call me when you can. :) x'

His texts always make me smile.

I replied back,
'Goodmorning Lukey.❤(: I'm not going to school. I'll call you when you get out. xx (:'

It was currently 8:10 a.m., school starts at 9:15 a.m. so I knew Luke would text me back soon.

Just then my phone buzzed.

'Okay, well I hope you're feeling at least a bit better. ♡ I'll talk to you after school. Don't forget to call.(; xxxxx' the text said.

'Thank you. I won't forget. :)'
I replied.

I was wearing my fuzzy Batman pyjama bottoms and a baggy shirt with a penguin on it that Luke bought me awhile ago to match the one he has.

I got up, ignoring the pain, and ignoring the urge to cut. Well, trying to.

I walked into my bathroom, it was in my room so it wasn't far.

I brushed my teeth, combed out my hair, and put it into a high ponytail.

Then I saw my eyeliner pencil sharpener.....

It was terrible.

I have cut before, but that was almost 3 years ago. I'm 16 right now, almost 17. So I was about 14 then.

I tried so hard to resist.

But....

I couldn't.

I grabbed my eyeliner sharpener, (which was actually just a pencil sharpener that I used for my eyeliner) broke the razor out, and Sliced my bare wrist. I winced at first, but then I got used to it.

I let it bleed for a while then wiped it up.

I threw on a bunch of bracelets then walked downstairs to get a Poptart. I saw my mom sitting on the couch, I said Hi and She said Hello back, then I got my Poptart, walked back up to my, room and sat down on my bed.

I pulled out my laptop and started watching Netflix.

I was watching Once Upon A Time.
I'm on season 3.

--

I watched Netflix until about 3:37 p.m. then I realized that school gets out at 3:40. So I turned my laptop off and just messed around on my phone until about 3:50, Luke doesn't have band practice today, so I called him at 3:52.

The phone rung twice before a voice answered, "Hi Lila!"

"Hi Luke!" I replied, followed with a laugh.

"So I'm guessing you're feeling a little bit better?" He asked.

I looked down at my wrist. I felt so bad, I didn't think about Luke.
How I would tell him.
If I would tell him.

I couldn't tell him.

"Oh, yeah. I guess." I said forcing a laugh after.

"You sure?"

"Yes." I said sternly.

"Okay." He replied.

"Well I gotta go, I'll talk to out later, okay?" I said.

"Okay bye. I love you." He replied.

"I love you too." I said then smiled, even though he couldn't see my smile.

I hung up then layed down on my bed and was just thinking.

What if Luke finds out?

I don't know if I can tell him.

But if I did tell him, How would I?

What am I going to do?

I closed my eyes and I felt myself slowly drift into a deep sleep.

--

I woke up from my nap, looked at the time on my phone, and it was 7:43 p.m.

I walked downstairs and my mom and dad were in the kitchen, they greeted me asking me questions like,

Are you feeling better?
Are you in pain?
Are you okay?

I just shrugged to all of their questions and sat down on a barstool.

"What's for dinner?" I asked.

"Steak!" My mom replied.

"Yay!" I exclaimed.

My dad lightly laughed and sat up then sat down in the living room and turned on the TV.

When the steak was finished, my mom set up all the plates and called my dad in.

We called grabbed a plate and our dinner. We all sat down and talked about random things.

When we all finished our dinners we put the plates and utensils in the sink.

I walked up to my room and went to bed.

My wrist.

What have I done?

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A/N: I've Never cut before so I didn't know what to put tbh.lol anyways. Yeah. Updating tomorrow. Love you.❤(: