I woke up in a hospital bed, and I felt someone holding onto my hand, so I looked over to find that it was Luke. He was looking at the floor, when I had turned to him he looked up at me. His eyes widened and a smile was forced upon his mouth,
"You're awake." He said."What happened?" I questioned trying to sit up, but my whole side and my thigh was in pain, then I remember what happened. Jack kicked my ribs and thigh.
"Do you remember anything?" Luke asked me.
"I remember......" I took a long pause before finishing my sentence, "Jack was hitting and kicking me."
"Okay. Well, me and Ashton, Calum, and Michael were going to Ashton's house for band practice, but we had to stop by my house real quick, then all I saw was you on the ground and some guy hovering over you, then I yelled at Ashton to stop the car, so I jumped out and was running over to you, then I saw the guy punch you and kick you, then I really got mad, so I kept running then the guy looked at me, then I punched him in the face, and he got knocked out. He's not that tough." Luke told me.
"I remember someone was running over to me but I didn't know who it was because everything was blurry." I said.
"I'm so sorry Lila." Luke said while putting his head on our hands that were entangled with each others, "I should have walked you home because you said you didn't want a ride. I shouldn't have Let you go alone."
"Luke, It's not your fault." I told him, but he just shook his head.
"It kinda is.." he mumbled.
"No It's not. It's Jack's fault, He's a dick." I assured him.
"Still.." he replied with his head still on our hands.
"How bad was it?" I asked him.
He handed me a mirror so I could look at my face.
I was horrified at the reflection.
I looked terrible, I had a big bruise across my right cheek, a red mark on my left, and my jawline had a big bruise and some cuts with dried up blood. I felt a tear run down my cheek as I put the mirror down and put my head on the hand that Luke wasn't holding.
"Does it hurt? Like right now?" Luke asked as he was looking up at me.
"Not really, but my leg and ribs do." I replied.
"Oh...The doctor did an X-ray of your ribs, and he said that 1 of your ribs is broken, and another is cracked." He said.
I lifted up the dress-thing, that the doctors had me wear I guess, and there was an ace bandage wrapped around where my ribs are.
Then I looked at my thigh that Jack also kicked, and there was a bruise the size of the tip of a shoe, of course.
"When can I go home? Does my mom know?" I asked Luke.
"You can go home whenever you want, and yes. Your mom knows. She said that She can't come to see you because She is working right now. And if you go home before her and your dad gets home, then She asked me to stay with you until they get back." Luke replied.
"Oh, okay. Thanks." I smiled.
"So when do you want to go home?" He asked.
"Can we go now?" I asked.
"Yes. I'll go tell them" he replied and got up then walked outside of the room I was in.
He walked back in with a doctor, the doctor smiled and said "so you want to go home now?"
"Yeah." I sighed.
"Alright, we just need you to sign some papers first, is that okay?"
"Yes." I replied.
He walked out to get the papers and such, then moments later walked back in with about 3 forms, "here you go." He smiled.
"Thanks." I replied.
I finished signing the papers, then I was released and Luke called Ashton asking him if he can pick us up and drop us off at my house. Ashton picked us up, there was no talking the whole ride to my house.
We got to my house so me and Luke hopped out of the car and walked up to the front door, I grabbed the spare key that was under a flower pot next to my door.
We walked in my house then plopped down on my couch.
We watched movies all night until my mom and dad came home, which was around 9:40 p.m. then Luke went home.
--
I woke you the next morning in pain.
My whole side hurt.
My leg.
My face.
But most of all,
My dignity.
I can't believe I let that happen yesterday.
I can't believe I just sat down on the sidewalk.
I didn't fight back,
I didn't try to run away.
I didn't try.
I didn't do anything to stop Jack.
I just sat there and took it all.
I only yelped once, when Jack had punched my face.
Then all of the rest was a blur.
The first punch hurt,
And it hurt like hell.
I wanted to just scream,
I felt like punching something.
I felt like hitting my head into a brick wall.
I felt like slapping myself.
I felt like dying.
I don't know why.
I just got an urge to do something, but not kill myself. I have a good life, except yesterday.
That was the only dent.
That was the only bad thing.
That's why I'm so confused,
Why would I have an urge to hurt myself when there was only one bad thing that happened to me recently.But then I realized that it only takes one bad thing to happen for someone to feel like shit.
But still,
Why would I feel like this?
Why would I feel like
I wanted to
cut.