Jennie's POV
"I'm setting you free, Happy Last Anniversary" that words break my heart into pieces it already happened, Jisoo left me. I want to follow her when she runs away but I couldn't move from where I standing it feels like I'm stuck there.
"Jisoo left me, I lose her what I'm gonna do now?" I keep asking on my mind it really happens all my fears happened I lose the woman I love, I hurt the girl of my dreams. Yes it's all my fault why all of this happened now she's gone and everything falls apart. I must think this consequences in the very first place, my regrets can't help me to face this reality. How can I restart? How can I live with "no her" in my life. Can I still fix this? No, no stupid question it's impossible to fix all of this, I can't blame her if she wants to forget me. They're right "regrets is always in the end" because I'm experiencing it now. We broke up on the day of our anniversary the day that supposed to be a happy day for the both of us but because of me it turns out to be the saddest and heartbreaking day of our life, I can't forget her tears and how she breakdown infront of me. I don't want to go back to my apartment I know that Lisa and Rosé are there and besides that's where all of this happened I don't want to go back to the place where I hurt the girl of my dreams so I go outside to find some fresh air even though I want to see Jisoo I have nothing to do because I don't know where is she right now.
"She must be crying somewhere now" these thoughts hurts me deeper, I hate seeing her crying but stupid me I'm the reason why she's crying now. I know her, she doesn't want to cry infront of everyone she always pretends to be tough but the real is she's not, she's weak one time I asked her why she didn't want that anyone will see her cry she said that she wants to be tough for the people she loves and besides who will wipe their tears if she cries and that's what I love the most about her she's so kind she acts to be everyone's shoulder for them to lean on even though she, herself needs someone to lean on too. When I learn that things I decided to be her shoulder anytime so that she will be able to cry, but now that I hurt her who will stand to her side to be her shoulder?. I took out my cellphone from my pocket and when I opened it I saw my lockscreen it's me and Jisoo in Jeju Island the place where our relationship starts.
Flashback
"wow it's so beautiful here" Jisoo exclaimed, it's weekend now so I decided to take her out for a date she once told me that she wanted to go here in Jeju so I bring her here I'm courting her for about 2 years and I'm willing to wait however long it takes. I met her when we're first year college, Nayeon is her friend so she introduced me me to her. She's so beautiful I can't stop myself to fall in love with her or should I say it's love at first sight so I decided to court her a week after we met and now it's already 2 years since I promised that I will wait for her. My day is complete everytime I see her, she already introduced me to her family and they all approved me as their daughter's suitor, actually her family likes me so much for her they even invited me in their family gatherings and teasing Jisoo and I's relationship every new things I learned about her the deeper that I fall inlove I promised to myself that I will never let this girl go, I will wait even if it takes 10 years for her to be ready to answer me.
"Why are you smiling like a dumb?" I'm taken aback from my thoughts when she suddenly speaks.
"Uhmm nothing I just remember something"
"Ahmm Jennie can I asked something?"
"Yeah sure, what's that?"
"Are you not tired?"
"Tired from what?"
"From waiting for me, you know it's been 2 years. Did your feelings for me are still the same?"
"Even if it takes 10 years for you to answered me I will never get tired and my feelings will never change"
"What if I say no?" She asked that makes my heart beats so fast is this her her? Will she rejected me here?
"If you say no I will stop and go in a far place to forget you"
"You will leave? Will you not fight for your feelings expecting that I might change my mind?"
"Yes I will not, it's your decision to reject me and that means your heart doesn't belong to me staying and fighting is not the best way to win your heart if you already made it clear that you doesn't love me yeah it hurts but what can I do I'm just your suitor I must know my limits but that doesn't mean that I don't love you enough to fight for you its just that I love you enough to let you go and be happy for the decision you will make "
" What if I wish for you to stay? "
" I will still leave, my feelings will never change if I stayed here especially now that I already fall deeper. My heart needs a space and I will never have that space as long as i'm with you, everytime everyday I will just hurt myself so no I will not stay even if you wished it. Why are you asking me this questions? Is that's your way to say no? "
" No"
"You know if you don't feel anything for me don't hesitate to say that to me, don't pity me. So are you rejecting me?"
"No I'm not rejecting you okay? And I will never because I already love you" she said and I look at her with a wide eyes she looks at me and smile "Yes Jennie Kim you heard it right I already love you so that means it's a yes" she added.
"Really!? Yes!? Gosh I can't believe this. Wooh Kim Jisoo is my girlfriend now!!! See this beautiful lady beside me? She's my girlfriend now wooh!!! Gosh I'm so happy" I shout, I don't care even other people thinks I'm crazy the important is Jisoo is my girlfriend now.
"Stop that you're embarrassing" she said chuckling.
"I don't care I'm happy that's all I care. Wooooh ever..." I didn't finish what I'm saying because she covered my mouth.
"I love you so much Jennie Kim"
"I love you so much Kim Jisoo"
End of Flashback
I smiled at that memories. The memories where it all started. The memories I know that I can't go back anymore.
"I'm sorry Jisoo I hurt you love. I wish I could be a better version of me for you" and with that my tears fell
YOU ARE READING
Regrets |JENSOO |
Fanfiction"I wish I could be a better me for you" When someone's trust is broken, it's hard to get it back, there are things we've done that can't be changed, there's no reason to cheat because if we really don't like it we can't do it remember cheating is a...
