Of Course, It's You

Chapter 18

HANNAH

Hannah stormed through the front door of her house, startling Jason and Lyvie mid-drawing contest. Judging by the jagged vibrant lines and chaotic whiskers, it was a toss-up whose kittens looked more like a cat.

Jason looked up from his coloring sheet. "Everything alright? I thought you were going straight to that social thing. Weren't you supposed to be out late?"

She hummed noncommittally, pressing a kiss to the top of Lyvie's head.

"You...okay?" he asked again, more gently this time.

She looked down at Lyvie, then shook her head subtly and addressed Jason without really answering him. "I just needed to freshen up. Maybe eat something first." she peeled off her jacket. "You staying the night or coming back in the morning?"

Jason had promised to cut up the fallen tree in the backyard. Something he insisted she not try on her own.

"Still up in the air. Depends on how late you party tonight." He waggled his eyebrows, making her roll her eyes. "Is Carmen going to be there?"

Groaning, she tossed her keys on the counter. "Don't even get me started on that headache of a woman."

Jason laughed, "Come on, you seemed to get along with her the other night."

She blushed and chucked a crayon in his direction. It missed. "Yeah, well that was before she accused me of—" she cupped her hands over Lyvie's ears, "—sleeping my way into my job."

"What the fu-- udge cookies?"

"Nice save." she muttered, biting into an apple. "And get this, she's the daughter of Robert Mills. You know, Daddy Mills, who owns the label."

Jason blinked. "Wait—"

"Yep. That's who bought us out."

"Holy shi... shipwreck"

Hannah arched a brow at him.

He shrugged. "What? You've always had expensive taste."

"Not the point."

"So, what now?" He ventured to ask.

She paused, taking another bite, chewing slowly. She had no idea what came next. Especially after what happened in the bathroom.

"I don't know." she admitted. "But..."

"But what? Is she firing you?"

"I... ran into her in the restroom before I left this afternoon."

Jason tilted his head, amused. "You ran into her in the bathroom?"

Hannah exhaled sharply. "Not like that, you perv. She, I... I had an attack. Thought I'd cool off alone. But she followed me in, and... I don't know." She opened the fridge, using it as an excuse to avoid his eyes. "She didn't make it worse."

Jason didn't respond right away, and Hannah was grateful. He had a gift for silence when she needed it most. Knew when to listen without pressing, allowing her thoughts to settle when she wasn't sure what to say.

He didn't ask questions. Not about the panic attack, at least, not yet. He'd save them for later, once they had time to process.

So, she ate the leftover macaroni and cheese that she and Lyvie had made the day before. Then, she showered. She always felt gross after an anxiety episode. Drained, heavy and sticky with dried sweat.

Hannah checked the time and saw she had ten minutes until the Uber would come to pick her up, but three outfits still laid on her bed waiting for a decision. None of them felt right.

Would it be weird to change into something different? Would it be weird not to? Was this entire line of questioning completely unhinged?

She mumbled through a mouthful of toothpaste as she tugged on her dark skinny jeans and a navy notch-neck blouse. Her ankle boots clacked as she crossed to the mirror.

Her eyeliner a touch thicker than normal, a swipe of waterproof mascara – just in case, and hair curled into loose flowing waves. Though, the humid air would likely undo that within an hour.

Downstairs, she found Lyvie and Jason on the couch. Toys were scattered everywhere like playroom confetti. Jason's dark hair stuck out in clumps via the barrette clips pinned there. Lyvie pointed at an upside-down picture book, narrating nonsense with total conviction. Jason looked deadly serious as he listened to the story she couldn't read yet.

Hannah leaned against the archway, silently capturing the moment on her phone. One day, she'd frame it and gift it to him without explanation.

"I love you," she said, softly, not quite directed at either of them individually.

Lyvie looked up, beaming over the upside-down book . "Mommy! You look pretty!"

"Did your uncle bribe you to say that?"

Jason snorted.

"Either way, thanks, sweetie." She glanced at her phone. "Alright. I'll let you know how tonight goes. Thank you for babysitting."

"Stop. Lyv and I are having a blast, aren't we?" He turned his head to see the page, "I'm learning about... a cat detective."

Hannah smiled, "She's been on a huge cat trend lately."

"You know what that means..." He started to say.

"Don't even start!" She held up a finger, pointing in his direction. "I cannot take care of a fourth living creature around here right now."

"Fourth?" He echoed in mock-offense.

She laughed and bent down to kiss Lyvie's head. "Mommy will be back later, okay? Be good for Uncle Jason."

She ruffled his hair, careful not to dislodge the barrettes. She flicked one of the tufts of dark hair that stuck out of a clip.

"Hey, easy now. You'll upset the very talented hairdresser. It's a masterpiece!" He shook his head from side to side making the hair jiggle.

"Oh, I know. Very edgy. Trendsetting, some might say." She smirked. "Lyv, if you go to beauty school, you'll already have a head start with this client." She eyed Jason speculatively. "Did she give you a My Little Pony name too? I'm sure some girl will love to call you that in bed too." She teased.

"Oh, ha ha. You should do stand up with that comedy act you have going on there." He whipped his head from side to side to allow the tufts to flip around.

She grabbed her keys. "Love you both. I'll see you later."

The bar was already packed, even though the stage was still dark. When she'd spoken with Rhonda earlier, She mentioned that the performance lineup would be a surprise. Most of the public didn't know who would be playing yet, which meant the bulk of the staff had a chance to get inside before the crowd swelled.

As she stood near the back, scanning the room, Hannah took a long breath. She prayed it wouldn't become shallow again. Carmen might be here. Or maybe she wouldn't. Either way, tonight had more on the line than whatever was between them.

She'd finally agreed to meet Mike, now that he was in town. Asking him to meet her here? She couldn't fathom being alone with him for that. Not yet. She needed to be in a public setting. A loud setting. Where they couldn't have those deep conversations she knew they needed. She just wasn't ready for that. Not tonight. And definitely, not after what had happened only hours ago.