Twisted MC-Devin & Nicole

Twenty Nine-Devin

*Flashback*

I can't fucking think straight. This trip is turning into a massive nightmare. Lauren slams me with guilt about not being close enough so that Ethan can see me whenever he wants. She constantly hits me with how much she wants us to be a family and try to work things out.

Ethan and I are spending more time with Lauren than I care to. It started with her going with us to Legoland, and now, it's all I can do to sneak small spans of one-on-one time with my kid. Thank God for Mrs. R intervening, or I would never get alone time with Ethan. Lauren got me to her place yesterday, only because I thought I was picking Ethan up. She opens the door with no fucking shirt, bare tits, and a lacy thong. I just rolled my eyes at her, walked in, asking where my son was. She reaches for me, grabbing at my dick, which sent me into a fury. I pushed her away, making her fall back on her ass. I swear I didn't mean to but I didn't want her touching me either. And that was the start of a knockdown, drag out argument. I ended up having to call her parents. Her dad came over, disgust and hurt on his face as he pulled her kicking and screaming into her bathroom, so I could finally leave the apartment. Almost every encounter with her is like this, if things don't go her way. Ethan wasn't even there, for which I was actually thankful. He didn't need to see that shit!

She just doesn't get that we're not good together...we never have been. All she wants to do is reminisce about the past and how good we are in bed, going into way too much detail about what she wants to do to me. To her, that means we had a good relationship. I'll admit the sex used to be good...that was the whole point of us being together, we were just fuck buddies. She always knew that...it was only a physical thing, even though we agreed we wouldn't sleep with anyone else.

I'm coming upon the end of my trip, so I decide it's time to sit Lauren down with her parents, and gently try to explain that we are not good for each other, as much as she wants us to be. It can never work out between us. She starts sobbing and begging me to try and then I say it...I am in love with someone else. And just like somebody flipped a switch, the real Lauren appears. She flies into a rage again, screaming, cursing, and throwing things at me, but just as she's about to walk out of the house, she stops suddenly. A nasty, wicked grin slides onto her face and she screams that Ethan isn't even mine, slamming out of the house. What the fuck? Is she messing with me because I pissed her off? I don't even know what to say...I just sit there looking at her parents, who are as dumbstruck as I am. My head starts to spin and I keep telling myself this is just one of her regular drama tactics, but deep inside, deep in my gut, I'm actually wondering if there is any truth to what she said.

Several days later, Ethan and I are at a nearby park when I get a call from Lauren's father. She's been taken to the emergency room... Lauren tried to hurt herself. I scoop Ethan up and rush to the hospital.

All of this shit has me feeling like a crazy person. The kid I'm thinking is mine may not be. The kid's mother has seriously and intentionally tried to injure herself. What kind of soap opera shit is this? I can't even make this stuff up, man!

Every night I am dragging my ass back to the hotel, with a crazy fucking headache, and I go straight into the bar for hours. I feel like I'm left with no choice but to extend my stay because 1. my "maybe" kid's mom is having a mental health crisis and 2. I need DNA testing immediately. So here I am sleeping longer than I want in a bed that isn't mine, missing my girl, who probably isn't even my girl anymore...man, this shit is exhausting. I wake up stressed, go to bed stressed. I just want to go home.

Nicole is my only happy place. She stays on my mind, and I miss her so much, but I can't begin to think about bringing her down with this. It's such a shit show, and I don't want her near it. I feel horrible for not contacting her...I've tried so many times, but I don't even know where to begin with this crap.

Prez called...and well, let's just say he's ready to kill me. Nicole isn't handling any of this well...I'm not sure what I can do about it though; I'm barely keeping my shit together. All of my energy and my brain cells are right here in California. He tried to get me to promise that I would call Nicole, but I just can't right now, so I told him I would deal with her when I return. He went on a tirade, telling me I better handle my shit asap or there won't be anything to handle when I get back.

Fuck.

*End Flashback*