As It Was ▸ Obi-Wan Kenobi

5. Varykino Villa

The looping hallways of Varykino Villa had sated my nervousness; I felt I was sinking into the place, the part I was playing becoming more and more real. Obi-Wan had taken my hand, holding it like it was the most normal thing in the galaxy. For a fleeting instant I could see us standing together in some other life, some version of ourselves that did not involve the Jedi Order and was just us living on some gorgeous planet where no one ever bothered us.

"You still with me?" Obi-Wan asked, squeezing my hand.

I shook my head, sending the images scurrying away, "Sure am. Let's go husband."

He leaned in so only I could hear, "Let's go Mx. Kenobi."

—

As the night wore on, I couldn't help but wonder why nothing had gone wrong. Nothing ever went this right. No one had even looked sideways at Padmé. No one had squinted at us in recognition. The political discussions were going swimmingly. And I was giddy with joy at getting to spend the evening hanging off Obi-Wan's arm.

Anakin and Senator Amidala had long since disappeared and I was beginning to think that this was all a ploy to get Anakin on-planet where the two could excusably be alone together. Obi-Wan pretended not to notice their absence and I pretended not to notice the way he had averted his gaze every time he saw them. I imagined that he deliberately shoved away any memories of other times his former Padawan sat too close to the regal Senator or gave her too long of a hug.

Everything added up now. I'd always pretended not to notice the way Anakin's presence in the Force burst with life anytime Padme was in the room, the way he never stopped looking at her, the way he had been so nervous to meet her again for the first time all those years ago. Even the image of little Anakin rose in my mind, the way Obi-Wan had told it, Anakin's eyes took in Padme as if she were an angel coming to rescue him.

But tonight with the evidence staring me in the face, I came to the same conclusion that I suspected Obi-Wan had: as long as it never directly interfered with Anakin's official duties, he could pretend it wasn't happening before his eyes. Because they needed Anakin far more than the Jedi Council needed to know that Anakin had fallen in love with the Senator.

As the evening progressed, Naboo's sunset faded, only one moon reflecting onto the lake now, the guests slowly vanishing into Varykino Villa's many rooms. Only the occasional wanderer in search of a midnight snack appeared, but scurried away upon catching sight of the two sharing a plate of food on the grand balcony overlooking the lake.

At least that was my impression of the one child who wandered into the room behind us and all but ran away when we turned to look.

"I'd turn and run too if I saw you backlit by moonlight and glowing so ethereally," Obi-Wan said without looking at me.

I felt a blush rise on my cheeks, "Ah yes, because I am oh so angelic with my hair in desperate need of taming and a good night's sleep."

I didn't look at him either. It felt safer to tease him without looking for risk he'd see right through me, for fear that he would sense that I wanted him to continue, to tell me everything about how he thought I was angelic in his eyes.

Obi-Wan set down the glass of wine he had been nursing, the dark red substance glittering in the twinkling light of the moon, "Cecil, you're always angelic."

I mentally berated myself for the shot of joy the words gave me, the warm flame of affection I'd been snuffing out making a new attempt to surface. An involuntary shiver passed through me and I thought about how Naboo's summer was cool this year, uncharacteristically so according to Padme. But after the earlier rainstorm, the clouds had vanished and left the outlook onto the lake clear. With our backs to one of the intricately carved pillars of the balcony we were almost touching, our arms balancing careful millimeters away from each other.