Abnormal scenes

Rama monolog (about Tamane)

Every day I see her walk to school. I think she's from the village near by.

We've only been going to school together since middle school started, but I've known her way longer. I don't think she remembers me, though. I almost forgot about her too, but now I hold onto the memory like one of my greatest treasures.

I hope that I'll never forget her shining eyes in the dim light of the lantern she was setting down in the river. As the lantern met the water it splashed around the edges and made a sound, many would argue with me but to this day I think that her light shone the brightest of all. She was small and petite, we were young after all, barely 6. But even back then I knew that she was probably the prettiest girl I've ever seen. And in 7 years, my opinion hasn't changed, I was reminded of that when I saw her again after all those years, our eyes only met for a second, but to me it felt like an ete

Now, her hair has gotten longer, reaching to her mid-thigh. It was black and silky looking, probably soft to the touch. She always wore it in low pigtails, only two bows holding it together, many times I've felt the urge to pull on them just to see her hair pool around her back. Leaving it open, she would probably look much more angelic than she already does. But her penetrating gaze has always stopped me. Bright emerald green eyes that usually looked blank or tired, felt like they were looking right through me. That if I even looked at her a second too long, my facade would shatter and my feelings would lay out in the open, for not just her but everyone to see.

So I looked away, not in shame or disgust like she might assume, but in fear. I always knew that I found my own feeling hard to handle, never finding the courage or the way to express them correctly. But I feel like she could see my cold words for what they are. And I want to know hers too, her words, her voice.

I don't think I've ever heard her speak before, she never says anything. I know she's smart, from the not-so subtle glances I've thrown over my shoulder at her tests or worksheets. I wouldn't have minded if she wasn't, but the fact that she is makes her even scarier to approach.

I've also never seen her smile before, she always wears a blank expression. So many times I've wanted to ask her if she was alright or if she needed someone to talk to, but the words always got stuck in my throat and I just found myself staring at her. I want to know everything about her. I want her to trust me and talk to me. I want her to smile at me, because then I'll feel like it's only reserved for me.

But every day I sit in front of her, thinking about what I could talk to her about, so many ideas flood my head but as soon as I turn to face her my memory is wiped blank. But only then, when I'm turning to her, I'm able to notice the slight odor of tobacco surrounding her. Usually I hate tge smell, but when it's her, it's comforting. It's a familiar smell and that reassures me, I don't like new things, after all. I don't like them, because I'm scared of breaking them. So I'd rather have something worn out and tired, someone like me who's learned to find comfort in pain and hardship.

Then I turned around to her, "Your name's Tamane, right?". The room was filled with other voices, but I could still hear my question echo off the walls, absorbed in a conversation that hasn't even started. What a stupid question. For a moment I thought she would just ignore me, thankfully though, I got my answer. "Yea". Her voice was soft and felt like a breath of spring in this stuffy, overheated classroom. It was only a simple word, but it made my affection grow larger in record time. She answered me. Me.

Shit, I don't think there's a way out of these feelings..