Imperfectly Perfect

I miss You?

No matter what happens, I will always love you. I cannot get these words out of my mind for the past two week. I didn't want to tell all those stuffs to him that day, but I did. Two weeks passed since our 'dinner'. He texts me often, and asks to meet sometimes, but I always made some excuses saying that I have work or I have some engagements. I don't wanna show him my vulnerable side again. I was carried away that after seeing him in our café. That day was one such vulnerable day for me when I would let my past take over me and overthink a lot. P'Wat must regret meeting me now.

Days passed, I still tried to ignore his texts. He never called me. Maybe he felt uncomfortable talking to me? I don't want us to be together again. I was just a teenager when we broke up, but now I am almost 25 now. Im mature enough to know what I want and I am damn sure that I don't wanna be with him anymore, not at least emotionally. Why did my parents have to choose Phi as my future husband? I am stuck now. I cant do anything about it now. Our families are busy preparing for our marriage. They wanted me to take part in the wedding preparations- choosing the venue, the decorations and all, but I politely excused saying that I am fully packed with workload for atleast a month. They didn't say anything to me as they have always felt that my job as an assistant editor demand more and more hard work.

Tine, are you ifnoring me ? ( Tine, are you ignoring me?)

I read my fiance's text one morning.

Bub, plaese don't ingore me na...

I love you sooo much

I konw u r hrut, but talk to me na. AAtleast share your pain Bun.

U jnow I sm alqays theer for you riftht? ( you know I am always there for you right)

I love you my Bun...I love youuuuu soooo muucchh My Tine

U don't kwno hwo much I hvea wiatde fro u my lveo. Pweese come back to me na ( u don't know how much I have waited for u my love, please come back to me na. )

I miss u...

Ur phi isss wiatning fro u. I will. Abd always habe waited for you lobe. ( ur phi is waiting for u. I will and will always wait for you love)

My eyes started getting blurry after reading those messages. But somewhere in my mind, I felt happy reading those messages. He still loves me. At least I have someone who loves me dearly and would miss me. But my heart pained at the same time. I recalled all those moments when I was selfish and hurt him. I have hurt him a lot, maybe more than anything and more than anyone deserves to be hurt. I am selfish... How I be so self obsessed that I kept on hurting him everyday? He does not desrve this. This doesn't deserve me! Tears started coming out my eyes and I fell on my knees and started crying. I don't know where tese tears are coming from. But I couldn't stop crying out loud. Its my first time crying out like in the last 8 years. I stopped crying when I realised I didn't even deserve to cry bcz it was me who broke up with him.no.. I could not cry even if I wanted to. But today, reading his messages broke me. I always believed that I had moved on. But today he proved that I am still the same old Tine. I missed him. I missed him like hell.

He was drunk yesterday. I know it because he used to drink and then text me whenever he would get drunk. It was not easy to get him drunk. But the one time we had an argument and I didn't talk to him for a few days, he went to a bar and got himself drunk. It only happened twice. Once when we were in relationship and the second time was when I broke up with him. He tried to call me and talk to me, but I never picked up the call. I cried a lot that day. I don't know how much I had cried, my eyes started paining and my breaths started getting heaving. I could not breath. Everything got out of hand today. My eyes started becoming blurry, my limps shivering and breaths were getting heavier each passing second. I tried to find my inhaler and walked towads my room, but I could not see anything and felt a sharp pain in my head before I felt like my body gave up on me and I fell on the ground.

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Again, I am sorry for the slow updates. I am struggling with my final year now. So I guess, there will be slow updates. But I am trying to update as soon as possible. Pleasse bear with me. And also please feel free to comment you opinions and vote for this story. Ur opinions matter a lot and if you guys find this story lacking plot, let me know ok?

Love,

Miss Bunny