It was a really,really hot day and this blonde decided she would buy a drink.She went to the vending machine and when she put her money in ,a can of soda came out-so she kept putting money in.It was so hot ,a line was begining to form behind her.Finally,a guy in line said,"Will you hurry up?We're all hot and thirsty!"And the blonde said,"No way.I'm still winning."
How many blondes does it take to milk a cow?Eleven.One to hold the udders,and ten to lift the cow up and down.
A depressed blonde decided to commit suicide by hanging herself from a tree in the park.A few days later,a man was walking his dog and spotted her hanging from the tree.He ask the blonde what she's doing and she replies,"I'm hanging myself."Then the guy told her,"Your suppose to put the rope around your neck not your waist."The blonde says,"I tried that,but I couldnt breathe....
Eleven women are holding on to a rope.One is a redhead and the other ten are blondes.One person has to let go to save the others.The redhead said she'll do it because the blondes are all good friends.The blondes were so happy they all claped......
Whats black and blue and lying in a ditch? A redhead who has told one too many dumb blonde jokes.
There were two blondes, and they had just came from a store.
The blonde that owned the mustang had locked her keys in the car. She was trying to pick the lock when she stoped to rest for a second. When she sat down, her friend said, "Hurry up, it's starting to rain and the top's down!"
Why did the blonde have tire tread marks on her back? From crawling across the street when the sign said "DON'T WALK".
Why'd the blonde get fired from the M&M factory?
She kept throwing out all the W's.
Two blondes had driven across the country to see Disney World in Florida.As they approached it and got onto the final stretch of highway, they saw a sign saying "Disney World Left!"After thinking for a minute, the driver blonde said "Oh well!" and started driving back home.
There once was a blonde who was very tired of blonde jokes and insults directed at her intelligence.So, she cut and dyed her hair, got a make-over, got in her car, and began driving around in the country.Suddenly, she came to a herd of sheep in the road. She stopped her car and went over to the shepherd who was tending to them."If I can guess the exact number of sheep here, will you let me have one?" she asked.The shepherd, thinking this was a pretty safe bet, agreed."You have 171 sheep," said the blonde in triumph.Surprised, the shepherd told her to pick out a sheep of her choice.She looked around for a while and finally found one that she really liked.She picked it up and was petting it when the shepherd walked over to her and asked, "if I can guess your real hair color, will you give me my sheep back?"The blonde thought it was only fair to let him try. "You're a blonde! Now give me back my dog."
What's a blonde's idea of safe sex?
Locking the car door.
