small town antics {SOUTH PARK X reader}

chapter 29: a conversation with a friend

Your POV-

I drove home in silence, but my brain was loud enough to fill my car with blaring noise. I basically zoned out on my ride home and was slightly shocked when I pulled into my driveway.

The door was unlocked for me when I came home. I walked in and saw Dad, Liane, Eric, and Heidi scattered around the dinner table with scrapped paper and magazines sprawled out everywhere.

"Y/n! So glad you're home!" Liane called out, her messy bangs fell over her reading glasses. Her smile really can brighten the dimmest rooms. I immediately felt better.

"Rehearsals end early?" Heidi asked. Her brows were furrowed because it was unbelievable that Mackey would ever let us out on time.

"Oh, no. I had to leave early, I need some time to clear my head before Hell...I mean Tech Week in a few days."

She smiled and beckoned me over to the table. She shooed Mr. Kitty off of a magazine and started flipping through the pages.

"We're circling ideas for bouquets, decor, and meals for the wedding reception. Oh, and we left some dinner for you in the fridge. If you're tired, don't feel guilty to go up and get some rest, baby," Dad said, massaging his neck from the pain of staring down at the table for, presumably, a long while.

"Wow! Thanks! And I'm not going up, I clearly have the best eye for design here. I'm going to pick the most amazing ideas from The South Park Gazette and leave you all in my dust!"

It was nice to come home to a somewhat normal family after a long, drama filled afternoon. I felt a small sense of relief but it didn't last for too long. My thoughts began to swarm once more.

After about an hour, Heidi bid us all goodbye and went home. Eric tapped out shortly after she left. He said all the mushy gushy love stuff made him sick. Dad and Liane retired to their bedroom as well, so I found myself sitting alone at a table filled with wedding dresses and happy couples. It really felt like a slap in the face.

I picked up the magazine featuring my favorite option for a wedding dress. I wondered if that would ever be me. I found a way to ruin all of my romantic relationships so I was doubtful. Whatever, it's just high school. I shouldn't take this stuff so seriously, right?

I rolled my eyes. No I shouldn't, but I made Red feel like shit. I exasperatedly groaned and put my head in my arms. Not only did I fuck up a friendship, I was dealing with a situation that was bigger than just me.

One night, Red and I were having a sleepover and I asked an honest question: How did you find out you were gay? I was curious because she's always said she had been sure about her sexuality since middle school. She said that male validation never meant anything to her, in fact it disgusted her. She never understood why girls on the playground would fall head over heels from a secret note saying that "so and so is the hottest girl in class." She was jealous (which was something she always struggled with) but not of the girls. She was jealous of the boys. "How come I can't make a girl feel like that, that's stupid? Girls make me feel like I have a hornets nest in my stomach all day everyday!" I remember her saying. She explained that she's had only one long term relationship, but it was a summer thing. A girl a year older who lived in South Park from May to September while her parents worked remote from their ski cabin. Red explained to me that this was one of the first times she was sure of who she was. There was no doubt about it. She loved women. The way they talk. The way they touch. The way they taste. And many more reasons that I don't even have to name.

Red looked me in the face that night and told me that I made her feel sure of herself.

God. I cringed super hard and lifted my head from off the table. No amount of apologizing could rebuild our relationship. I struck a chord deep down that only her mind can mend.

I decided that I would give her space to heal. One week. No contact. I know that one week seemed short but seven days is a long ass time to avoid someone you love dearly. But it was needed.

I turned off all the lights downstairs and began to dial up Tweek. I had to let him know so he could listen to my side of the story and also understand my reasoning.

"Hello? Is everything alright, it's late," Tweek answered the phone almost immediately.

"Hey! Uh...yeah, yeah. I'm fine. Um, I did want to talk to you about something."

"Okay..." Tweek trailed off, "I think I may know what this is about."

"Did she tell you?"

"Yeah. But I don't know Y/n, I can't pick sides so please don't ask me to-"

I swiftly cut him off, "Ohmygod, no! No, I would never make you do something like that."

"Thank God," he let out an audible sigh of relief.

"I just wanted to tell you that I'm going to be giving Red some space. A week to be exact, with no contact, no interaction, nothing. And I wanted to tell you for two reasons. One, this lack of contact may affect how much I'll be seeing you. And I need you to know how thankful I am for our friendship and I don't want to jeopardize that. I love you," my voice started to break, the tears were coming. Classic Y/n.

"I love you too. I promise I wouldn't think that, but I am glad you said that...what's the other thing?"

I took a deep breath, "The other thing is that I know. I know I really messed up. There was no possible way I could manage a best friend slash lover situation. It just never ends correctly, and deep down I knew this. I just didn't want to tie myself down and have to be sure of who I really was because that stuff lies deeper than a FWB situation. But, I should've experimented with someone I didn't have such close attachments to."

"Yeah, maybe." Tweek stated.

"Yeah..." the awkward silence ensued.

"But the important thing is that you understand that. You need to express the same things you said to me, to Rebecca, when the time is right. I trust you'll do what's necessary."

"Thank you, Tweek. You're important to me."

"You're important to me too. Good luck Y/n! I believe in you!"

"Thank you, lovie. Goodnight."

"Goodnight."

I blipped the red END button on my phone and flopped back onto my bed. My calendar caught my eye. I sat up and noticed red writing circled with a bright sharpie: TECH STARTS TODAY.

I counted the days on my fingers. Tech week started on Thursday. Today was Wednesday. TECH REHEARSALS START TOMORROW.

I groaned into my pillow. Tech will begin and I will be focused on that.

But I really knew that Tech Week would barely be a distraction from the real hell week at hand.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hi guys! I'm back?? I just wanted to pop on and spit out a short transition chapter for the next part of the story. Thank you for the continued support, it is all very appreciated.
- lana