Does He Do It Like I Do It

Chapter Seventeen

"I can't believe you got me going to this shit," I heard Jodeci complain from the speaker of my phone. I rolled my eyes and unzipped the garment bag hanging on my closet door and took my dress out. 

My school had been preaching all year round about how they wanted to do more things to get kids involved and out of the streets. They thought it would be a good idea to throw an end-of-the-year dance to help transition the kids to their next grade level. Jodeci thought it was the dumbest idea they'd ever come up with but one puppy dog look from me and she caved in. I went to every school dance at my old school and I wasn't about to stop now. My dad transferred money to my card during school and told me to pick out something nice to wear. I was being indecisive until Jodeci got pissed off and demanded I just pick something. I ended up getting a navy blue off-shoulder dress that stopped right above the knee with silver fringe at the bottom. I had some square-toe silver heels that I had never worn and decided this was the perfect opportunity to bust them out.  I put on my dress and shoes and then sat in front of my vanity mirror to unwrap my straightened hair. I parted it down the middle and let my hair hang on my shoulders. I looked at myself in the mirror and debated dying my hair a dark red. I thought to myself that it was time for something new. 

"You look beautiful, Roxanne."

I looked over my shoulder at the sound of my mother's voice. I couldn't help the attitude that I started to feel. I rolled my eyes and ignored her presence.

"Bitch, is that your mom I hear?" Jodeci said.

"Unfortunately," I responded.

I heard that Jodeci had disconnected the call and I huffed. I wanted to use her as a scapegoat to not have to talk to my mother. She walked further into my room and sat down on my bed. 

"Don't you think you should ask before entering my room and sitting on my stuff? What makes you think I even want you in here?"

"Roxanne ... I know this will be a hard transition for you-"

"Hard transition? What are you talking about?"

I could see her looking at me through the mirror. She took a deep breath and then folded her hands on her lap. 

"Your father and I have decided to get a divorce."

"That's pretty fuckin' obvious," I said under my breath.

"You will watch your mouth!"

I abruptly got up from my vanity stool, making it fall onto the floor. I turned around and faced her, my nose flaring from my risen anger.

"For somebody who single-handedly fucked up this family, you sure as hell keep telling me what to do like any of that shit matters!"

My mother got up from the bed and with hurt in her eyes, slapped me across the face. My cheek stung and my mouth hung open in shock. I placed my hand on my face and rubbed the warm area. There had been a lot of moments in the past when my mother would lose her temper with me. My father would end up having to get involved which only made it worse. However, she had never put her hands on me. Even as a young child I didn't get whoopings or other physical discipline.

"Damnit, Roxanne! You don't think this is hard for me? Do you think I wanted to do this? I love your father and nothing will change that. But I deserve to live in my truth. I tried with all of my might to make the perfect environment for you. I didn't want you to have to struggle as other people did. I wanted you to have the example of what love should look like."

"And that's what this is?" I choked out. "Cheating on dad? Leaving this family?"

She reached out for me and I stepped back.