Simple like cigarettes (Caitlyn kiramman x fem reader)

Becoming you

I laid shaking with half dried blood on the ground everywhere around me. Whimpering at the slightest movement I made. It even hurt to breathe. As much as I wanted to sob to scream, nothing would come out. Just ragged and uneven breathing.

'I just want to go home'

All that was heard was my screams and the force of when their kicks and punches that were directed to my body. I tried to protect my face but it wasn't enough. Every strike had me grasping for air. Every blow resulted in a loud yelp or a scream for help. I was so desperate I started to apologize. For everything I've done wrong in my life. After all my actions were the ones that got me in this fucked up prison. Hell I was so desperate I even started to pray to whoever the fuck was out there.

But nothing.

No one came, but flying fist and heavy boots.

They're not coming. I should've realized that sooner.
My hands stayed at my head to protect it.
Well it makes sense. I am a shitty person. This is probably what I deserve.

It didn't stop. Not even when my voice left and all I could let out was choked sobs. My throat burned and everything fucking hurt. Until one of the guards kicked my side. There was a loud crack that echoed through the room. Then the worst pain I've ever experienced came flooding in. I screamed as loud as I could and fainted.

And now I'm here. Back in my cell no guards. Just me on the floor unmoving. It's not like I could if I tried. I laid staring at the concrete wall the my head was positioned to. I let out a shaky sigh and closed my eyes.

No one is coming to save you.
Get up.

??? POV

I sigh dreamily as I walk in the bar I used to come to daily. It's been too long. I sat down on the barstool same spot from years ago. "Welcome to the last drop, what may I get you started with?" A big broad but familiar man asked focusing on cleaning a stain from a pint glass. "The usual." I told him. He furrowed his eyebrows and looks up from the cup. I watch as his eyes widen and jaw drop.

"Raymond?" Vander asks

"The one and only." I grin. "Everyone thought you... W-where have you been?" He asked placing the glass down. "These past..." he paused "nine?" "- nine, years?" Vander corrected. "Been everywhere, Settled down in Piltover. Thought I'd stop by this place bring some good memories and to look for someone" I told him smiling.

Vander's POV

I gave him a fake smile. "Vander have you seen-" Vi stopped mid sentence. Staring at the man sitting at the bar. "You're alive?" She whispered to herself. I asked myself that too. Everyone thought he died years ago. She knitted her eyebrows in confusion. She then balled up her hands into fists. She knows. She then glared at him. Ray looks at Vi in confusion "I've seen you before." Raymond spoke scrunching his nose as if he were thinking. "I know." Vi spat. I sighed and placed my hand on Vi's shoulder. "This is my daughter. Vi." I say.

His eyes widened as if he realized something. "Yeah fucker, you remember me?" She snarled. "Vi! Go downstairs now." I firmly told her. "But- "go. Now. I'll handle this" I told her. In reality I was mad too. If anything I'm fuming. She scoffed and shrugged my hand off of her shoulder. I watched as she walked downstairs and slammed the creaky door behind her. I turned to Raymond and smiled at him. "Sorry about that. Teenagers." I laugh awkwardly. "It's good man I know how they are." He laughs. "So what's your business with topside?" I ask filling a pint with tap.

"Got a wife and kids." He shrugged. My smile fell and so did my cheery demeanor. "Kids, huh?" I almost spat passing him his drink "Yeah. Two of em." He spoke happily as he took a sip of his beer. I grabbed another cup and began cleaning it. "How old?" I grit through my teeth. Roughly cleaning the pint glass. "Seven and a soon to be six year old. Boy and girl." He said. I tightly gripped the cup and took a deep breath in through my clenched jaw.

It took everything in me not to grab the man by the collar and rock his world. "Is that so?" I ask lowly slamming the cup on the table. "I could've sworn there was another one." I say looking at him with a slight glare. "What?" He asks more confused about me slamming the glass "The one you had with Adallyn?" I ask. His eyes slightly widened. Now I was finally getting to the point. "How are you goin to have a child. Neglect them, abandon them, Then proceed to have more children and act as if the first one doesn't even exist?" I ask him calmly.

"I have no idea who you're talking about." He lied "Have you even bothered to look for her? Do you even know how old she is?" I ask slightly raise my voice. "Vander where are you going with this?!" He also raised his voice. "I'm asking you a simple question. You're her father you should know." I motion my hand to him. "Why do you care so much?" He asked. "Why don't you?" I ask him. "Where is she?" Ray asked. "Now you want to know?" I scoff. "Tell me where my daughter is" he gritted.

"My. Daughter." I told him "what?" He asked. "You mean my daughter. I took her in when you didn't have the balls to raise her. I gave her what she needed. I love her. Don't call her your daughter when you know nothing about her let alone can't even say her damn name." I told him. "I can call her whatever the fuck I want. I'm her dad." He told me showing his true colors. "No you're not. You never earned that title. I did. I'm her dad. You're merely blood related but doesn't mean you aren't a stranger." I say. "If anything, her biggest fear is, becoming you." I glare at him. I grab my pipe and a match. I swipe the match on the counter and bring the pipe to my mouth lighting it with the flame.

"You don't know- "I raised that kid for nine years, I know a thing or two about her." I tell him exhaling the smoke. "What do you know?" I ask him. "If you won't tell me where she is I'll just find her." He said slamming down the cup and discarding the question. He abruptly got up from the stool. I sighed sadly "You won't be able to find her." I told him calmly. "You can't keep her from me." He told me angrily. "She isn't here, Ray. And even if she was, it's not like she'll want to see you." I spat. "You can't just walk back in her life after years and pretend you did nothing." I say.

He scoffed "Yeah. Some bartender giving me advice on how to parent a kid." He said rolling his eyes. "I'm not giving you advice I'm just letting you know. And for your information no. She isn't a kid anymore. She's not the same eight year old you abandoned nine years ago. She's grown, almost turning eighteen. Almost an adult. But of course you don't know that because you've never stuck around to see." I spat.

"The only reason you're here is because you feel guilty. You want to clear your conscience. Tell yourself 'eh i tried' but and then go back home to your two kids and wife. Then forget about her. Again. Have more kids love them as much as you want. It won't make you less of a shitty father." I told him inhaling the smoke from the pipe.

He glared at me. "Just tell me where she is." He said. I sigh the smoke coming out of my nose and mouth. "Not like I could even if I wanted to." I told him. "And why is that?" He asked. "I wish I knew." I shrugged. He scoffed and began walking away again.

"Hey!" I called out. He looked back at me.

"I'm some bartender who's ten times a better than parent you will EVER be."

Who's Ray???? 👀👀 sorry for a short chapter really wanna get this one out. anyway guess who got a PC?? I can finally play left for dead 2 again 😩 but bro this book is feeling like a whole movie to me. Feeling cinematic. Sorry for no happy happy good time but duty calls 😤. I'll probably (key word PROBABLY ) have some fluffy flashbacks next chapter but that's if I don't feel like wrecking your hearts. Anyways pls comment yall give me entertainment and motivation 😫❤️

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