Rules All And Takes Nothing Home

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Previously On Scarlett's Wife..........

Scarlett: Hey my name is Scar-

Crissy: Yeah I know who you are. My name is Crissy.

Scarlett: Hey  Crissy. I've been looking for a girl that meets your description and I happen to think that you are hot.

Crissy: Thank you. That means a lot to me.

Scarlett: Wanna kiss?

Crissy: Sure.

Jurui: We have Five minutes to get off this ship and onto the emrgency ship.

Scarlett: But we are both naked!

Jurui: THAT WAS YOUR DUMBASS DECISION!

Scarlett: (Grabs Jurui by the throat) You better shut the fuck up and get the other ship prepared before i make a covid mask out of the skin on your face!

Jurui: OH PUTAIN!

Zitzu: Guys!

Jurui: ZITZU WHERE THE FUCK HAVE YOU BEEN?!!!

Zitzu: Planifier mon évasion. (Shoots a hole in the rocket)

Crissy: (Screams) AHHHHHHH!!!!!

Scarlett: YOU PIECE OF SHIT!!!!

Jurui: Put a helmet on!! (Put's astronaut helmets on Crissy and Scarlett) Where's mine?

Zitzu: (Holding Helmet) (Throws helmet through the hole in the rocket)

Scarlett: NOBODY KNOWS WHAT YOU ARE SAYING! (Flies out of the rocket with Zitzu)

Crissy: SCARLETT!!!!

Scarlett: Crissy!! You are the only one that can save us. Leave the rocket and bring the backup shuttle to our location.

Crissy: I dont know what any of those words mean.

Scarlett: (Kicks Zitzu) GET THE DAMN SPACESHIP!!!!!

Crissy: ( Pushes button) (Jumps out of the  rocket in slow motion as it explodes behind her)

*Spaceship crashes on top of Natasha Lyonne*

Aubrey: OH MY GOSH!!!

Crissy: GUYS!

Lizzie: Crissy!!!

Atriel You are alive!!!

Lizzie and Atriel: (Hug Crissy)

Scarlett: (Stands up and exits the ship as her bra falls off)

*Cars pull up and paparazzi get out*

Andy Sandberg: (Snaps picture of Scarlett)

Scarlett: Shoe!!!

Lizzie: Move!

Crissy: Get away from my wife!!!

Aubrey: Did they not make it clear? (Throws stilettos at paparazzi) Back the fuck off!!
(Hugs Scarlett) Welcome home.

News reporter: This just in. Scarlett Johansson and her Wife Crissy Johansson have returned to earth. We will have more news later on them returning to earth.

Scarlett: CUT THE CAMERA OFF!! (Smacks Reporter in the back of the head with a hammer)

Lizzie: YOU!!

Jodie: Oh well if it isn't Ms. Elizabeth Shitty

Lizzie: You take that back otherwise im gonna break your back you trifling hoe bitch!!!!!

Jodie: THATS IT!! (Holds up gun)

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