Somewhere in the mind of a teenage girl

In the back of my mind

How can you say you love me and then get mad at me over the tiniest things?
How can you ignore me but when I ignore you I'm the one that's wrong?
How come you can talk about your interests but I can't talk about mine?
I fucking hate you for it, getting mad at me all the time.
But I've said this before it just wasn't to you, I've played this game before but it wasn't with you.
I've danced this dance and sang it's song but in the end it all went wrong.
I keep these bad memories hidden away from all my good ones.
They're stored nice and neat in the back of my mind. They're in a little wooden box with a chain and a lock.
But now it's like the box was knocked over and the chain and lock broke, all the memories spill out and swarm in my mind.
They've pushed through all my memories so they're front and center all the time.
Suddenly I'm in 6th grade again sitting in my room with the closet light on, tears pouring down my face as I wondered what I did wrong.
Suddenly it's July of 2020 and I'm being yelled
at by a boy who claimed to "love" me.
But none of it was love. That isn't what love should be.
I take my trip down the long dark road where all the bad memories stay.
I guess I took a wrong turn while looking for the light of memory lane.
That's where the mental photos from my hiking trip reside. Every detail and moment makes me feel lit up on the inside. That's where the memories of me and Brooklyn go, they're in a little house by the beach that has a little boat. From there we sail on into memories from the summer- Wait I'm getting off topic.
The memories I have of you are slowly getting a spot in that little brown box with the chain and the lock.
And there they will stay until they finally wash away.
Don't worry, you'll be okay, in the back of my mind.