Somewhere in the mind of a teenage girl

Falling

I've had these feelings since February and I won't let them drown out now. I've loved you for to long to let them fade away.
I can't settle for someone who doesn't see me for me. But even if he did I wouldn't want it to be.
I don't like him. I never liked him. So why does he like me?
There must be a simple answer to put my mind at ease.
In all honesty, I hate him. He makes my skin crawl and my blood boil. When I get a notification from him, a wave of unease settles in. I feel gross, I feel disgusted that I've led someone on. God I'm sick to my stomach just thinking about him.
I lead him this way then that way. Spinning him around thinking maybe this is his chance to get the girl but it never will be.
The girl is interested in someone worth her time and her energy.
Run me dry boy, I'd travel the ends of the earth for you.
He leaves me alone crying but you send me home smiling.
12:00 o clock car rides thinking about our hands intertwined.
God I hate him.
I wish he knew that I only have eyes for you.
His witty assholeish replies are nothing to your sincere genuine responses.
I could go on for hours but it wouldn't matter. You don't see me enough and he sees me to much.
I hate it. I hate him. I hate you. I hate this stupid app, but most of all, I hate myself for falling so god damn hard for someone who may never care at all.