What do you want?

Yoongi/Namjoon/Jungkook x Reader - depression/comfort

A little something I wrote for a request on Tumblr about two months ago lmao, I thought I could share it here! It was requested in the form of a song, so if you're curious, it's My girl by 4MEN

Also, just a side note but I will begin working on the requests here very soon, I don't know how fast I'll be able to finish them but I'm not forgetting about them! They're all in my drafts~~ I'm so sorry that it took so long for me to show a sign of life in here jdjfjfefjek

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Namjoon:
Baby, did you rest well today?
Yoongi, Jungkook and I are on the way back home now
I miss you so much, can't wait to hug you tight babe
We'll be there soon

I stare at the messages sent by one of my three boyfriends, then shift my glance to the mirror in front of me.

Despite knowing that they would be here by seven tonight, I could only manage the strength to start getting ready at six, and now, here I stand, still not showered, a pathetic version of myself that makes me want to cry, I can't possibly let them see me like this.

A month ago, I was pulled into my boss' office at work because he was concerned for my mental state as I had not performed quite as well as I usually do. He had heard feedback from a few coworkers saying that I didn't laugh, didn't smile anymore, that I looked more tired too, and so he decided to give me a "mental health break".

In other words, I got sent home because I was under-performing and it was bothering everyone.

Since then, I feel like my mood has fallen down an endless pit and my boyfriends have been there to pick up the pieces only to witness as more fall apart, I don't even know why they still try anymore, I don't know how to get better anymore.

I look down at my phone again, then lock the screen before dropping it on the bed. Why do they still bother? There's no point trying to fix something that's broken, they should just get a new one instead.

I don't know what spurs me on when I reach the kitchen before climbing the stool to reach Yoongi's 'secret' stash, I just know that the different bottles of alcohol look terribly appealing right now. Maybe they could help me feel better.

Maybe if I'm drunk, I'll be a little bit closer to the girl they fell in love with all those years ago.

I grab a random bottle then clumsily step off the stool before making my way to the counter where I grab a tall glass from the cupboard, and once the bottle opened, I pour a big amount of the clear liquid until I feel like it's enough.

Without bothering to put the bottle away, I start gulping down the liquid like water, and while the burn to my throat feels like fire, it's nice. At least I feel something with this.

I slam the glass down once done, then wipe my mouth with the back of my hand before making my way to the bathroom, a look at the time showing me that I have probably less than ten minutes before they get here.

I don't even have time to take a shower, but as the alcohol sways heavily in my stomach, I decide to say fuck it and turn on the shower head with the temperature set to the hottest my skin can endure.

I should be able to smile soon, right? I'll be able to laugh with them, even if it makes me feel stupid?

I take another glance at my reflection from the shower's glass as I undress myself and I feel tears rise up, fingers gripping onto the fat that hangs around my waist, when did this happen? When did I start not fitting into my clothes anymore? Could I even still wear the outfit I was wearing when I met the three men who now own my heart?

The humid heat starts causing condensation to form on the glass until I can't see my reflection anymore, as if to free myself from the shackles that this detestable image has put on me and I step into the shower where I stand under the water to submerge my head, and as my hair starts sticking to my skin, as the water starts burning less and less from getting used to its temperature, I begin feeling pitiful.