Accepting You

Chapter Nine

Yusuf was taking full responsibility this time. It was his fault Asiya had bumped into him.

He had been loitering in Clyde & Co's food hall, swallowing his yawns with large gulps of bitter coffee.

Working for a busy commercial law firm meant his days were always full, the meetings always ran over, the tasks were always urgent, and the deadlines were always too close.

Yusuf liked the work. He enjoyed the puzzles. 

He didn't mind the hours either. Yusuf couldn't manipulate time, but he could stay ahead of it. That was a challenge he enjoyed.

Finishing tasks early also gave Yusuf a few seconds to breathe before the whoosh of falling files squashed all his air again.

But recently, just as Yusuf finalised a file, another file would fall onto his desk just as quickly. Or a demand disguised as a 'polite request' would fly into his inbox.

It was like people were stalking Yusuf, monitoring his digital diary, waiting for a blank space they could colour in.

That was how Yusuf had ended up at Clyde's. He was covering for his co-worker. His fellow trainee had called in sick. Again. For the third week in a row.

Alice, Yusuf's supervisor, had beckoned him to her desk, explained the situation, and innocently asked if Yusuf would like to sit in on the upcoming briefing. Just so he could get a feel for the case and see if he liked it.

Yusuf didn't have to take it if he didn't like it. That was implied, not said.

Yusuf had sat in the briefing and struggled to keep his eyes open. He had dragged his stylus over his tablet, creating sleepy scribbles as he listened to the client yammer on. 

After the meeting, Yusuf didn't want to take it.

However, Alice had implied he had a choice but did not say so. Unspoken words or hints weren't binding in Law.

Plus, an extra case was a chance to earn more approval. A crumb of approval was advantageous, especially as a trainee.

All the trainees were in their final round of the Hunger Games. The arena was built from desks and chairs; their weapons were their work.

The prize? A chance to be one of the dozen trainees retained after their two-year training contracts concluded in a few weeks.

Yusuf wanted the promise of security, stability, and success through a job offer. He willingly joined the race for that contract.

But Yusuf's legs were becoming tired. It was becoming harder to keep up with the standard he had set, and the further away Yusuf got from his dream, the more its shape twisted and morphed into something that resembled a nightmare.

Alice had promised Yusuf he would have more flexibility and time when he qualified. However, Yusuf had witnessed Alice tell lies and claim they were borderline truths, so he wasn't sure whether he believed her anymore.

But his accommodation was quiet. Too quiet, even for someone like Yusuf, who had learnt to exist and thrive in it.

Under all the files, cases and papers, Yusuf hadn't found his voice to tell Alice no. But at least he wouldn't hear his inner voice while he was under them.

Yusuf was overworked.

Yusuf was so sleep-deprived that he had thought he was hallucinating when he saw Asiya walk into the hall. He hadn't believed she was real, so he had made an excuse about needing serviettes and ventured forward.

Yusuf had needed to make sure Asiya wasn't a figment of his imagination or a stranger with a similar face.

He had taken fast and giant strides towards Asiya and had become winded when he realised it was really her.