When Yusuf sat up at Fajr time, he first noticed how empty the room felt.
Yusuf had watched Asiya cradle herself on the sofa before he locked himself in their bedroom, but he hadn't expected her to sleep on it.
He had thought she would trickle into their room later; however, her side of the bed hadn't been untucked.
"Asiya," Yusuf croaked as he cracked open the bedroom door. His throat felt raw, his voice sounded strained, and his mouth was exhausted from all the running it had done last night. "It's time to pray."
Asiya was sitting cross-legged on a prayer mat. A small Quran was open in front of her. "I've already prayed," she said without turning to look at him.
Yusuf cracked the bedroom door open some more. "Are we still going to do dhikr together? Recite Quran?" he asked, already knowing her answer.
"What do you think?" Asiya hissed before Yusuf shuffled away.
- A -
Asiya didn't go back to sleep after Fajr. Her thousand-pound sofa felt uncomfortable under her bones, and her mind wouldn't let her body rest anyway, so she put it to work.
Asiya swept and mopped the floors, loaded and reloaded the dishwasher, defrosted the freezer, and polished her windows until they gave her uninterrupted views of the city.
She sprayed, sanitised and wiped every item in the flat as though they had been stained by their words from the night before and muscled away layers of limescale until her fingertips felt raw.
She picked up the broken bouquet of roses and placed them on the counter.
Yusuf had accidentally stepped on them last night.
Their petals had been crushed and were prematurely wilting, and their stems were bent, but they were salvageable.
The sun had fully risen, barring Asiya from attempting to go back to sleep. She picked up her phone and punched out what had happened between her and Yusuf last night on her screen.
Aminah 8:45 am: What exactly did you say made things get that bad?
Asiya 8:45 am: Aminah, what the hell. You're MY sister.
Aminah 8:45 am: Yes. ☺️ I know that.
Asiya 8:45 am: So why are you assuming it was my fault???
Aminah 8:46 am: I didn't say it was your fault, but you have mummy's tongue. We all do sometimes.
Asiya 8:47 am: ...I didn't say anything too bad.
Aminah 8:48 am: 🙄 Asiya, do you even believe yourself?
Asiya drafted a message to her sister, and her heart sank.
Her words looked so harsh in black and white. Asiya couldn't bring herself to repeat them. She highlighted her message to Aminah and deleted it.
Why did I say all those things?
Asiya knew she wouldn't have been able to take them back, but she had been so angry. Everything inside of her had fired up and vomited out of her, and she had made Yusuf sick, too.
Asiya 9:15 am: I called him names. I said horrible, horrible things to him, Aminah. He said some awful things back, too.
Aminah 9:15 am: Was the marriage course I gifted you guys a waste of money!?
Aminah 9:16 am: Rule 1 of fighting with your spouse (because you will fight with them) Don't. Insult. Each other!!!
Asiya 9:17 am: I know.
YOU ARE READING
Accepting You
RomanceAsiya was cruising through life, totally okay with carrying more weight than she could. Or at least, that's what she wanted everyone to think. Yusuf was cool and supposedly composed, committed to working hard. Or at least, that was the plan until...
