Rancorous

Chapter 28

PRESENT

Herlina

On Wednesday morning, a day before Thanksgiving, my appointment with the therapist was scheduled. My grandmother offered to miss her book club meeting to accompany me for support. I told her that she didn't need to and to enjoy her time with her friends. It took a bit to convince her I was going to be okay to go alone.

When I arrived at the address my grandmother had told me, I checked in with the receptionist. Timothy Pearce came out of his office to personally greet me only ten minutes later. Dr. Pearce was an averaged height man who looked in his late thirties. He had a tailored dark grey suit, gelled back dark brown hair, and bright blue eyes. After our official greeting, I followed him to his office.

It was a large room, with a mahogany desk near a broad window and large bookshelves against two walls. Instead of sitting at his desk, Dr. Pearce sat on one of the maroon couches in the middle of the room and he gestured for me to take a seat on the opposite couch across from him. He had notepad on the coffee table but I couldn't see what he had written because of the large vase of flowers blocking my view.

"How are you doing today Herlina?" He smiled, crossing his legs and perching his notepad against his lap.

My instinct was to proclaim that I was doing perfectly fine. But I knew that the purpose of this session was to tell the truth. Taking a deep breath, I said, "Not as great as I would like to be. But, there are a lot of things I'm grateful for, so I'm learning to focus on that."

I didn't know what therapy was going to be like. I'd expected him to immediately begin questioning me about my mental health, but to my surprise, we delve into an easy conversation. We were simply just getting to know each other. We talked about hobbies, family, likes and dislikes. It put my nerves at ease.

We laughed as he was talking about his favorite comedy movie. His bright white teeth flashed, his eyes crinkling at the corners as he shook his head gleefully.

"I'm going to have to watch that movie." I uttered in between my giggles.

"You should, definitely." Dr. Pearce took a drink of his water. "Have you ever been to therapy before Herlina?"

I shook my head.

"Okay. That's alright. I'll tell you how I basically like to lead my sessions. I like to get to know you first and for you to get to know me, like we've been doing here, before we move onto talking about deeper topics."

I nodded.

"I want you to feel comfortable and understand that everything we speak about will be confidential."

"Okay."

"What made you seek therapy Herlina?"

I cleared my throat. Taking a deep breath, I said, "my grandmother made this appointment for me. She thought it was necessary for me after what happened last week on Tuesday."

"I see. Would you like to talk about the incident that occurred last week on Tuesday?" His voice was soft, pouring out like warm honey. It was calm and welcoming. The type of voice that immediately encased you in a bubble of comfort.

I nodded and proceeded to tell him what happened, just as I did to my parents and friend—former friend Presley.

"Does it hurt to talk about it?"

"Somewhat. Surprisingly, remembering it doesn't hurt me as much as..." I trailed off, not wanting to bring up Brevin. Wanting to guard the perception of him. "As much as I thought it would." I continued, "Obviously, I wish it had never happened."