Dear Santa

46

December 18

Dear Santa,

I was hard. I didn't know what to do, or what to say. I also didn't want to choose between them because obviously, that'll look like I'm favoring the someone over the other, but I had no choice. And it's not like my parents are at that age to be petty about it. It was somehow their fault anyway. If they didn't separate, I wouldn't have to choose between who to go to this holiday. I won't be having a hard time deciding. It won't be hard growing up, because as a child, it was exhausting to go back and forth because of two adults co-parenting you.

But I guess, that's how it is. If they didn't separate, there won't be any Jewel, Janina, Jake. Maybe I have a totally different sibling today, or not.

I wanted to go with Dad in Nevada because I haven't seen my grandparents in ages. But somehow, I also wanted to go with my Mom in South Korea because my cousins will be there.

I don't know. Spending time with Kai somehow distracted me from that. I wanted to say I'm glad that he's around, but I think we will read this by the end of the month, so maybe no. I had fun today because of him, and it really helped to lighten my mood. Like a breath of fresh air.

He's here in my room while writing this and as promised, he didn't say anything. After I gave him a pen and paper, he immediately started writing something on it. He even looked cozy on my bed, bold of him to do that. My mom gave him a pair of pajamas that she always kept in the guest rooms in case my cousins sleep over (w̶h̶y̶ ̶t̶f̶ ̶a̶m̶ ̶I̶ ̶c̶h̶e̶c̶k̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶h̶i̶m̶ ̶o̶u̶t̶) but I'm really happy (rare) that he's here despite him not pressing about it. I find his presence soothing.

This is getting longer, so

Dear Santa,

I hope it won't last

Dearest,
M