A Part of My Memory

Zara

The right side of my face was numb and I had a pounding headache from that slap I received. I had never been slapped before, not like that. When Elliot placed an ice bag against my cheek I couldn't help but flinch. Despite how gentle he was trying to be, I still felt a sting from the contact.

"Sorry," he apologised.

"It's fine," I answered, my voice quiet.

It was just us in the room, the others had gone with Reed to tell the receptionist that we would be checking out early and to buy some food from the mini shop on the ground level.

"Hey," Elliot suddenly lowered the ice bag from my cheek and only continued speaking when I eventually looked at him. "How are you?"

"I'm fine," I dismissed, but Elliot read right through my words.

"I don't think you're fine."

"Ally just went through a horrible breakup," I stated. "It doesn't matter what I feel."

A jaw ticked in Elliot's jaw. "What you feel does matter," he said with surety. "How are you?"

"I'm fine," I said through clenched jaws.

"Talk to me, Zara," Elliot urged. "How are you?"

"I'm not okay, Elliot!" I broke, and I thought I had exhausted my store of tears on the ride back to the hotel, but I guessed not. "I got slapped by a man twice my size, I started taking a liking to someone who only wanted to sleep with me, and I already had problems with relationships but now I'm going to constantly be sceptical whenever a guy talks to me," the words tumbled out of my mouth and I couldn't stop them. I couldn't get rid of the thought that I had not only gotten hurt physically but also emotionally and mentally. "My friends got hurt because I couldn't say no to Reed quick enough. If I had we wouldn't have been at that party and—"

"It wasn't your fault," Elliot assured me. "You couldn't have known."

I opened my mouth to continue but the only sound that came out was a whimper and the next thing I knew Elliot had an arm around me, trying to calm my shaking body and uncontrollable sobs, telling me over and over again that it wasn't my fault.

By the time the others returned to the room, I had calmed down. None of us had an appetite so we didn't eat anything. Elliot and Reed left once we started packing our bags in silence, other than the occasional words of comfort. Once we had packed, we bunched onto the bed and held on to each other.

"Hey, you all still awake?" Serena asked after a long silence, and we all responded with sounds of confirmation. "Despite everything that happened today, I'm so glad I came here with you girls. I mean, I did so many things I've never done before, and that includes kicking two pricks in the balls."

We chuckled at that and I added, "yeah, same. I don't think I've ever spat in someone's face like I did today."

"Yeah, that was gross," Faizah commented with a soft laugh. "I tossed a book at someone's face."

"That was actually great accuracy," I commended.

"And I stood up for myself for the first time and fought back," Ally added. "It was quite satisfying pulling his hair. I wish I had done more though."

"Agreed," we replied simultaneously and couldn't help the laughs that followed.

"But honestly, I love you all so much," Ally said. "And Zara, I'm so sorry for trying to set you up with every guy who so much as glances at you."

"Yeah," Serena agreed. "If it wasn't for us encouraging you to go to that party—"

"Stop right there," I cut them off and repeated the words Elliot had said to me earlier. "It's not your fault, it's none of our fault, we couldn't have known what would happen."