A Part of My Memory

Elliot

I didn't panic when I woke up to find that Zara wasn't in bed, I had assumed that maybe she was downstairs. But I still didn't panic when I checked and saw she wasn't downstairs, I had assumed that she wanted to be alone so she went for a walk. No one else was up yet and the door had been unlocked, which confirmed my suspicions.

I went back upstairs and got ready for work, and by the time I was done, everyone else was up and ready too, already downstairs and eating breakfast. I joined them, and only when I saw that Zara was still nowhere to be seen was when the panic started to settle in.

"Have you seen Zara?" I asked no one in particular.

"No," Harley answered. "She's not in her room?"

"No, she wasn't in her room when I woke up, and the door was unlocked too," I told them.

Harley choked on her cereal, "do you think she left?!"

That thought hadn't occurred to me, but once Harley planted the idea in my head, it never left my mind. I rushed upstairs and into Zara's room. All her clothes were still in the wardrobe, but then again she remembered where she lived now so she wouldn't have needed to pack the clothes I'd bought for her.

I hadn't wanted to panic but now that was all I managed to do. What if she did leave? Or what if she went on a walk and something happened to her? What if she got into an accident? What if she got lost and forgot which way to go?

I tried calling her and when she didn't pick up I tried again and again. Before jumping to conclusions, I decided to call Reed but when I asked, he told me she wasn't at the café. Okay, I started to jump to conclusions then.

It was 7:55 and I had to be at work by 8:00. I walked the pace of the room, considering my options. I decided I was going to go searching for Zara rather than going to work when I suddenly remembered the morning meeting scheduled for 8:15. I cursed but went downstairs, grabbed my keys and left.

I got to work late but arrived for the meeting in the nick of time. The entire time I had been wondering where Zara could have disappeared to. Rather than focusing on the presentation and making notes of what everyone was saying, I was thinking of Zara. The meeting was called to a close and I tried not to look too eager as I left the boardroom. I racked my mind further and just when I reached my desk I suddenly remembered the tracking app I had installed on her phone. It wasn't necessarily a tracking app, it was more of a 'find me' app that showed your location. I had the same app on my phone so she could find me if she wanted to.

I opened the app and had to zoom out on the map to see Zara's location. She was back in her city. Had she really run away?

I had just grabbed my stuff, getting ready to leave when my manager appeared and asked, "going somewhere?"

"Pardon?" I asked despite having heard him.

"I need you to email me the notes you took in the meeting," he instructed before disappearing into his office.

I silently cursed. I had not been present in that meeting, I had been there physically but I hadn't been present, and I sure hadn't taken any notes either.

A task that usually took me 15 minutes took me a good 2 hours as I had to ask everyone who had been present what they had gotten out of the meeting, making sure not to look like I was hearing all the information for the first time. I asked the questions as one would in a survey to make sure they didn't suspect I was up to something.

Once I had gotten what felt like enough valid information, I condensed the points and emailed them to my manager. Then I quickly snuck out. Even if I had stayed, I knew that I wouldn't be able to get any work done when all I could think about was Zara.

The drive to her city lasted a good 3 hours and by the time I got there, it was already 3 pm. I opened up the app again and tracked her location, stopping outside the house the app claimed she was in. I stepped up to the porch and took a breath before ringing the doorbell.

A familiar young lady with blond hair opened the door. Serena's mother.

"Oh, hello," she greeted, seeming to recognise me too.

My worry subsided, almost sure that Zara was in here now. "Hi. I'm looking for Zara."

Serena's mother called for Zara and then faced me again. "You are Elliot, yes?"

"Yes, that's me," I confirmed.

She nodded and then asked, "you taking good care of her?"

"I am... or at least I'm trying my best to," I confessed.

"Good," she said but she looked as if she wanted to say more. She glanced behind her and then faced me again. "You know, Zara is much more fragile now than she ever has been, so you need to take care of her."

"I will," I told her.

"But if you don't intend to take care of her forever, then I suggest you two part ways."

"Excuse me?"

"I think it would be better if she stayed here." Serena's mother glanced behind her again. "Our poor Zara is already going through a lot, and if she continues to stay with you she'll only get hurt."

My brows furrowed in concern and confusion, "get hurt how?"

She was just about to answer when I noticed Zara appear in the corridor. She had her head lowered and she wasn't walking steadily. Slowly, she raised her chin and her eyes landed on me. Something was wrong with her.

My heart dropped and I wasn't thinking of anyone but Zara when I rushed toward her. I had been angry at her for disappearing and not picking up my calls, for making me worry and panic, but now all I felt was concern. I had just reached her when she fell into my arms. But I held her steady, wrapping my arms around her. She didn't start crying as I expected her to but just remained still, allowing me to hold her.

I didn't know how long I held onto her before I heard Serena's mother shuffle to the lounge and say to the other ladies, "She needs him to heal, I'm seeing that now."

"Let's just hope he doesn't heal her only to break her in the end," one of the other ladies said.

Serena's mother's earlier words echoed in my mind: 'if she continues to stay with you she'll only get hurt.'

I knew what she meant by that now. She probably knew about my engagement. I didn't allow myself to dwell on those words, I only focused on what she had just said: 'she needs him to heal.'

And I intended to do whatever I could do to make sure she healed.

But, 'let's just hope he doesn't heal her only to break her in the end,' echoed in the back of my head.