A Part of My Memory

Zara

The silence in the car was unnerving. I kept glancing at Elliot and each time his facial expression was the same.

Expressionless and impassive.

I didn't think I had ever seen him look so serious. Shouldn't he have been elated that the marriage was in play? But then again, why did Jess continue spewing figures even when it was clear that Elliot wanted to have a private conversation with her?

After five unbearable minutes of silence, I couldn't take it anymore.

"Why do I get the feeling you're upset?"

Elliot only glanced at me before focusing on the road again.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

Nothing.

"Do you perhaps not want to talk about it?"

He parked the car and then looked at me, "we're here." That was all he said before unbuckling his seatbelt and exiting the car.

I guess he didn't want to talk about it.

****

Shopping was supposed to be a fun and free activity, not a boring and dull task. Elliot was a living and breathing robot, so I took it into my hands to turn him back into a human.

"Let's enter this one," I grabbed his hand and pulled him, and he was so disconnected that he only realised where I had led him once we were halfway in the lingerie shop.

Elliot's breath hitched and he looked around frantically, "what are we doing in here?"

"What do you mean?" I asked innocently.

"Why do you need—?" He cut himself off with a sigh, and finally, his face showed an emotion other than stone-cold seriousness. Discomfort. "Forget it, I'll wait outside."

"Oh no you won't," I grabbed his arm and pulled him back. "We're shopping. This is a we thing, not a me thing."

"But I can't be in here," he whisper shouted.

"And why not?" I asked. "It's just lingerie."

"I..." Elliot sighed again. "Fine, just hurry up."

"Okay, but I need your help." He glanced sidelong at me. "Can you ask if there's a kiddie section? Because these are all too big for me." I purposefully grabbed a large-sized bra and held it against my chest.

Elliot choked on a laugh—a loud one—but even after covering his mouth he still looked like he was on the verge of bursting again, judging by the way he shut his eyes and took shuddering breaths. I did have small breasts, but my size was definitely in here somewhere, though Elliot seemed to be convinced otherwise.

He opened his eyes and dropped his hand, but as soon as he faced me again he burst out laughing, and I laughed in turn.

"We're going," he breathed, grabbing the lingerie from me and placing it with the others before catching my wrist and pulling me out of the shop with him.

Once we were far enough from the shop he released my wrist and rested his head against a wall. He took several deep breaths before facing me, a grin threatening to split his lips, "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have laughed at that."

"The whole point was for you to laugh, smartypants," I playfully shoved his arm. "You were so depressed, I had no choice."

"You said that to make me laugh?"

"Of course I did, my size can definitely be found in there," I said then considered. "I think."

Elliot raised his chin and looked up, taking a deep breath before looking at me again, pinching his lips together to stop himself from smiling. "You are impossible."