Why am I the star?//tsukasa angst//[DISCONTINUED]

Perfect

Tsukasa POV:
Finally, another show done. I don't know why, but I was eager to get home as soon as possible.
"Great job everyone!" I exclaimed to my troupe mates after the show, putting on my biggest star smile. For some reason it felt a little forced.
"WONDERHOY!!" We all shouted as a celebration of another successful show.
I turned around and waved goodbye to my friends, becuase the sky was getting dark.
When I looked away, my smile dropped.

Tsukasas thoughts= italics
Ugh, I messed up so much. I walked away too quickly from the stage! I even missed a line! What's wrong with me?
I started waking faster towards my house.
When I reached the door, I was expecting a warm welcome from my sister, Saki.
Oh, right.

She was hospitalized a week ago.

I smacked myself on my forehead. Your so stupid, Tsukasa. Stars aren't suppose to forget that their own sister is hospitalized!!
I ran up to my room and slammed the door, cold sweat running on my face. I opened a locked cabinet and took out a notebook.
Then I started to write down every mistake I made today.
Ran off stage too quick...forgot line....dropped textbook...
When I was done, I sighed in relief. Now that I wrote down my mistakes, I couldn't mess them up again. I was a star. I was perfect. Nothing bothered me.

Nothing bothered me...

I slammed the notebook shut. Why did I feel so nervous all of a sudden? Stars aren't suppose to have bad thoughts.

Stars aren't suppose to mess up.
Stars aren't suppose to be selfish.
Stars aren't....
Stars are suppose to be perfect.

I hit myself in the face the second time that day.
Why was I so imperfect! I need to try harder. Something's wrong with me.

I am a perfect star.
I am a perfect star.
I am a perfect star.
I aM a PerfECt sTaR...