Imaginary Therapist (It's much cheaper)

Mistakes

I've made a few mistakes. One of them being that I, even if at the time it seemed like the correct thing to do, dropped my actual school friends for online friends. Yea they were toxic but I was also toxic so that's not really a valid reason. No the problem was certain online friends didn't get along with certain school friends which led to so many arguments that I thought that the only way that shit would end would be by picking and choosing sides, which did actually result in me picking online friends at the time cause they seemed so much better than my school friends. I was wrong, I was very fuckin wrong but it's a little to late to go apologise and even if I did, they probably within their right, wouldn't re accept me as a friend. I don't care if they don't re accept me. Tbh I don't wanna be re accepted by them. I just want them to know that I'm sorry. I've realised this after being stuck in multiple arguments with online friends vs online friends, sometimes the group will argue with each other and split the entire group up for several days only to make up and get back as a group. I can't deal with trying to keep every single fuckin friendship glued together let alone any fuckin relationships that might pop up. And this isn't the first time I've tried introducing different friend groups but after this shit, it's the fuckin last. The first big fail was when I was still friends with people from school. I thought it'd be great to introduce my at the time online friends (who were in a different group entirely to the one I'm now in) to my school friends. Things went as smoothly as a child trying to skate on gravel. They all fell out and I picked the online group which was good for like a year and then crashed and burned. I ended up in a smaller group made up of a couple from the old group reforming a new one, which I once again cause I didn't learn my lesson, tried once again to introduce to irl friends. Guess what? Didn't work in the slightest. So a couple months later, I try again tho this time with college friends since I'd finished high school by the time I was about a year into this new group. And it went well. I'm kidding. Well it was okay for the first couple months I'd say, then hey presto, it also failed. As of currently only one college friend has actually been accepted into the online group I'm in and even though everyone gets along, there are still issues that pop up now and again. But I've fuckin given up with that shit. I mean I've given up with basically everything so one more thing won't change much..