Tie My Heartstring's ❦

bang

Katie

The door finally falls silent, leaving behind an oppressive stillness that envelops us. Relief washes over me, fleeting as I think of the possible intruder—just a neighbor.

But the warmth fades quickly, replaced by a cold sweat pooling in the pit of my stomach. Hudson's eyes bore into mine, unwavering and intense. "It's alright. Just a neighbor. Take a deep breath," he commands, brushing his fingers against my shoulder.

His touch is both soothing and electric, sending a shiver down my spine. I force myself to breathe, but the air feels heavy, each inhale jagged and sharp.

"Speak to me, Katie. What are you thinking?" His voice is low, almost a whisper, but the urgency in it sends a chill through me. I can't find the words; instead, I'm anxious, replaying the events of the past few days in my mind.

"The one thing we never wanted to happen could have just happened!" I finally blurt out, tears stinging my eyes. The raw panic in my voice catches him off guard. My anxiety spirals, memories of my father flooding my mind, the weight of his expectations suffocating me. I should have never stopped therapy; I feel the familiar weight of despair crushing down on me.

Hudson's expression shifts, as if he can read the thoughts inside me. Part of me craves his reassurance, but another part is wary of his moods lately. I can't predict how he'll react, and the uncertainty terrifies me. What if he gets angry again? What if he hits me again? The thought alone makes my heart race with dread.

He pulls me onto his lap, his grip firm, as if anchoring me to him. "Baby..." His voice is calm, but I sense the tension beneath it. I shift uncomfortably. I can't meet his gaze; instead, I inch away from him, needing distance, feeling like I might combust under the pressure of my emotions.

"What is it?" His tone sharpens, and I want to shrink into the floor. The warmth of his body is both comforting and suffocating. "Give me some space!" I finally snap, my heart racing as his anger flares. I can see the muscle in his jaw tighten, an artery pulsing dangerously in his neck. I ascend the stairs to my bedroom, before it turns into a fight.

Self-loathing gnaws at me. Why am I in this mess? Why did I let my anger spiral so far out of control? The knock at the door jolted me, reminding me of everything I was trying to escape from. And now, I'm involved with a man who's practically my father's age—my father's best friend. The thought churns in my stomach.

What is wrong with me? Yes, it feels normal, but how could I ever admit that to Hudson? The very act of acknowledging our relationship sends another wave of nausea through me. I sit onto my bed, tears streaming down my face, the world around me blurring into an indistinct haze.

Suddenly, Hudson's strong arms wrap around me from behind, warm and enveloping. "Why are you so upset?" I take a shaky breath, trying to pull myself together. "Hudson, I'm just confused about everything right now," I confess between sobs, feeling vulnerable and exposed under the weight of his gaze.

The truth is, I'm terrified of what our relationship means, of how it intertwines with my future. His silence stretches painfully between us as he holds me tighter, his breath warm against my neck. After a moment, he speaks, his voice gravelly with concern. "Where did I go wrong with you, Katie? What did I screw up to make you feel this way, hm?" His words hit me like a punch to the gut. It feels as if he's slapped me.

"What do you mean?" I stammer, stunned by his sudden shift in tone, feeling the guilt creep in. "Just leave me alone, if you're going to be a jerk." I scoff. Hudson scoffs, frustration boiling over. His face flushes with rage, veins popping in his neck as he struggles to contain his emotions. "Do you think you're in a position to give me orders, Katie? After everything?"