Tie My Heartstring's ❦

face it

Katie

My heart raced as I fumbled with the keys, anxiety and guilt intertwining like a chaotic dance inside me. Hudson stood behind me, a mix of familiarity and uncertainty, grounding yet destabilizing.

I finally opened the door to my apartment, revealing the cozy chaos I had come to accept. Clothes draped over the back of the couch, remnants of late nights and even later mornings.

Hudson stepped inside, his gaze sweeping over the room before it landed on me. In that moment, I could see a flicker of something—nostalgia, regret, or maybe hope. "Nice place," he said, his voice warm but hesitant.

"Thanks," I replied, forcing a lightness I didn't feel. I closed the door, leaning against it as I tried to steady my breath. "I wasn't expecting company."

"Yeah, well, I wasn't exactly planning on coming here either," he said, taking a step closer. The familiarity of his presence wrapped around me, making it hard to breathe. "But then you called. And everything changed."

My heart thudded in my chest, a rhythm that felt both thrilling and terrifying. I had sworn just last week that I was done with him, that I wouldn't allow myself to be swept away again. To never let him back into my life. And yet, here we were, standing inches apart, the air crackling with the remnants of our history. "Is this a mistake?" I asked, my voice barely above a whisper. The silence stretched between us, heavy with the weight of memories.

"I know it's not," he admitted, running a hand through his hair in that familiar way that made my stomach flip. "But I've changed, Katie. I promise. I'm not that guy anymore." I wanted to believe him. The warmth of his words clung to me, a combination of comfort and dread. We had shared laughter, dreams, and more tears than I cared to count. But could those moments overshadow the toxic patterns that had ensnared us both?

"Do you really think you can just waltz back in and everything will be fine?" I crossed my arms, trying to shield myself from the storm of emotions swirling within me. "What about the last time? The hurt? The lies?"

"I know," he said, his voice thick with regret. "But I can't just let you go again. I thought I could, but every day without you has felt like a mistake." My mouth dries. He looks so effortlessly handsome, except he's scowling at me. "When did you last eat?" he snaps at me. "Why?" I look down at my shoes, nervously.

Was it wrong I missed someone caring about my wellbeing, the way he did? "I don't want your smart mouth now. Answer me." His eyes blaze. "I had a soup today, and a muffin."

"When did you last have a proper meal?" he asks acidly. I peek up at the intimidating man in front of me, and his mouth is pressed into a hard line. "Well? Your last meal?"

"Hudson, that really is none of your concern," I murmur, feeling extraordinarily brave.

"Whatever you do concerns me. Tell me." No, it doesn't. I groan in frustration, rolling my eyey. Hudson narrows his eyes. And for the first time in a long time, I want to laugh. I try hard to stifle the giggle that threatens to bubble up. His face softens as I struggle to keep a straight face, and I see a trace of a smile kiss his beautifully sculptured lips.

"Well?" he asks, his voice softer. "I don't know," I whisper. He closes his eyes as fury and possibly regret, sweeps across his face. "I see," he says, his voice expressionless. "You look like you've lost weight. You're already slim enough as it is, Please eat, Katie," he scolds.

I stare down at my shoes. Why does he always make me feel like a child? He shifts and turns toward me. "How are you really feeling, Katie?" he asks, his voice still soft. Well, I'm confused as shit really. I swallow. "If I told you I was fine, I'd be lying." He inhales sharply. "Me, too," he murmurs and reaches over and clasps my hand. "I miss you," he adds. Skin against skin. "Hudson, I-"