Death with a kiss

When you're finally pushed past your limit....

*About 3 weeks later*

I walked home staring down at me pink sneakers as I did. Yes, this was me now. I was the loner who walked to and from school everyday. I got ignored by a girl I used to think was my long lost sister and I consistently get bothered by perverts at my school. I've had to run away from so many guys at school people have gotten used to it. Jerry's built a powerful army. Half of them don't even come to me just cause they're creepy perverts, they do it for him. It's like he has a gang or something, and trust me this is one gang you don't want to mess with. I mean one of these losers even followed me into the bathroom! I am so lucky one of the teachers noticed. Other wise he's be dead and I'd be the first suspect, rightfully so.

I was really tired of this, especially since I've done nothing to deserve so much hate. Guys know it bothers me, it's pretty clear to see. But no, they don't stop, they like seeing me in pain. And if girls didn't like me much back when I was known as the girl with the guy phobia, they really don't like me now that I'm known as the school slut. I've heard too many rumors about me sleeping with guys I've never met to count on both hands. I went from being a lesbian who forced her best friend into joining to just being plain promiscuous. I've covered myself up more becuase of this. I don't wear shorts anymore or tank tops, I don't mind short sleaves but I sure as heck stay away from cleavage or showing shoulder or anything. I just want to blend in again, I wan't to be able to hide like I used to. Isn't it enough having to live with the fact that you killed your best friend and possibly the love of your life? No, I guess it's not.  I felt like crying so much right now that I started speed walking a bit. My house wasn't so far away but I didn't want there to be any chance of anyone seeing me cry.

Suddenly I felt someone pull me back by my hoodie. I gasped and looked back to find one of my guy neighbors smiling evily at me. There was no other word to describe it, it was pure evil. "I've been calling your name for a while now Kim. Didn't you hear me?" he said with his australian accent. He was still smiling down at me and holding me tightly by the elbows. His green eyes were looking me up and down. He better let go if he knew what was good for him though. Not only was this guy major close to me but he was also major hot. I swear I hate my curse so much. The fact that he seemed like pure evil should've turned me off at least some but no here I was wanting to pull him in for a kiss sooo badly.

"Let go of me please!! Trust me, you need to let go. You need to get away." I pleaded but my tone of voice betrayed me so bad. I don't even know how but the way I said it sounded like I wanted him to come closer. Even I noticed this and it made me want to cry so badly. I closed my eyes and faced away from him hoping he would do as told.

Lucky for me he did let go. I ran as fast as I could to my house. But I didn't get to my door before hearing my neighbor/classmate yell back at another kid that I hadn't even noticed walking behind him. "You won the bet bro!! Man that hoe definitly has AIDS!! No question about it! You could tell just by looking at her." he said laughing afterwards. I opened my door as quickly as possible and ran into my room. I was so lucky my mom wasn't home. Otherwise it would've been a bunch of nonstop questions and I definitly wasn't in the mood for that.

I lay in bed face down and no matter how hard I tried I couldn't stop the tears from coming. How could they be so mean? If I was the horribly slutty bitch they're painting me to be I would've never stopped myself from kissing as many boys as I have. I'm not saying I do it completely for them but if I was a horrible monster I wouldn't mind killing a bunch of guys for a kiss...

If I was a horrible monster... I'm not a horrible monster! It's not my fault I was born this was born this way.. it's how I use it that determines wether I'm really a monster. But ok, if that's what they want me to be, if that's what they've been treating me like than I guess that's what they deserve.

It doesn't matter that I've worked so hard to not harm anybody. They don't give a shit. I don't even think they have a heart in order to give a shit. Fine, you know what they say about that. If you don't use it you loose it...